8. The Boujie Corper

This week, we discuss all things romance, from the excitement of the early stages of liking someone to the simple desire to be romanced properly. (Off Campus hive, stand up!!!!!!)

We also dive into Ayowande's experience as a corper, what NYSC actually means for young Nigerians and whether it's still worth doing in 2026.

Then we get into a conversation about home, independence and the strange tension between creating a comfortable life in your parents' house while also wanting a space that's entirely your own. We also discuss what it means to be an independent woman and the ways people can best show up for us and make our lives just a little easier.

And of course, Oyinlola's Corner™ returns with a rant about waxers posting far more of their clients on social media than any of us ever asked to see 😭

We hope you enjoy 🤍

Follow us on Instagram: @otclpodcast

Email us at otclpodcast@gmail.com

Episodes drop every other Friday🫶🏾

Transcript

SPEAKER_07 0:00

One thing about Nigeria, we all speak the same language.

SPEAKER_06 0:06

We all speak one language, one tone, one understanding. And I tell you, I spoke yesterday. I spoke and she got it. And I got my certificates.

SPEAKER_08 0:30

There is nothing greater than having a friend, having a guy that gets shit done. Oh my being. It is the it is the sexiest traits. It is and I 100%. It is so flipping sexy that I'm just gonna call you. Yeah, I need this done, and shit gets done.

SPEAKER_01 0:58

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:03

But he was just telling me, oh, alright, this is cool. Like, watch it so you can be learning and jot jutting things down. Learning.

SPEAKER_02 1:10

Are you saying that your MCM is not romantic?

SPEAKER_07 1:13

He's bloody romantic, gal.

SPEAKER_04 1:18

Fool me one time, baby. Hi friends. Hi family. I'm Winola. I'm Ayawande, your favorite cousin. Navigating this thing called life. And welcome to our thing called life. Enjoy. See ya.

SPEAKER_08 1:35

When I say Kia, you say Aura. Kia ora.

SPEAKER_06 1:41

Kia ora. Hey, Kia ora. When I say Kia, you say Aura. Come on. Kia ora.

SPEAKER_08 1:51

Kia Aura. That's how we're starting the podcast to see. Yeah. Hi guys.

SPEAKER_07 1:57

It looks like you came in with some agri energy today. I actually really like that. That was really nice. Yeah. Love, we gotta shake it up sometimes.

SPEAKER_08 2:06

You gotta shake it up sometimes. Because last week you accused me. Definitely.

SPEAKER_07 2:11

Yeah. Of trying to be sexy. You guys, you guys should even just tell her. You guys should tell her. Every episode. Hi, hi.

SPEAKER_08 2:20

That is not true. That's just how my voice sounds.

SPEAKER_07 2:24

Sorry, that just reminded me of the other day. Oh god, I'll tell the story when we get to the last segment, don't worry. But it's no, okay, wait, let me just say it now. Just say it now. I was talking to somebody within the NYSC institution. Um and because like I didn't want her, like I'd done something and I needed her to like help me figure it out. I was like, Ma, I just, you know, I just don't want. They would not. She now goes, why are you using bedroom voice to come back and talk to me?

SPEAKER_06 2:55

I said, Oh god, I said God.

SPEAKER_07 3:00

Someone cannot even just like someone cannot just even whisper a little bit. No. That's all that reminded me of. Your bedroom voice.

SPEAKER_08 3:10

That's not my bedroom voice. FYI.

SPEAKER_07 3:13

Hi guys.

SPEAKER_08 3:14

That's not my bedroom. That's not my bedroom voice.

SPEAKER_07 3:18

I mean, I wouldn't know. I wouldn't know. And that's for the best.

SPEAKER_08 3:20

You wouldn't know, and you shouldn't know, also. It's not for you to know.

SPEAKER_07 3:28

Screaming, crying, throwing up.

SPEAKER_02 3:31

Literally.

SPEAKER_07 3:32

Anyway, hi guys. Oh god. How are you? Hello, everyone. Welcome back. Welcome back. We're good. We're happy. We're happy to be recording again. We are um coming off of last week's episode, which you guys seem to really enjoy.

SPEAKER_08 3:48

Yes. One of my aunties actually messaged me about the episode. Um she did. And she was like, We're really trying. But she was like, Thank you guys for you know talking about it. That like, you know, sometimes that we don't know these things, and like it's um it's important to have these conversations, um, and at least you're shedding light on it, and like how you feel, and you know, we're all we're all trying, like we're all trying to work to be better. And I was just like, Oh yeah, but like I I feel like she is like out of all my aunties, like she's probably the most open-minded one, and I think she has a really great relationship with her daughter. 100%. So I feel like she would have felt that way anyway.

SPEAKER_07 4:34

Um of the other ones, mm-mm, mm-mm.

SPEAKER_08 4:44

Um, anyway, guys, we're recording on a Saturday, which feels very bizarre.

SPEAKER_07 4:50

I like it. I like it a lot. It feels really bizarre. Yeah, yeah, it does. Because usually record it at night as well, yeah. Giving moody vibes, but uh really it's like what 1 p.m.

SPEAKER_06 5:02

Yeah, Saturday afternoon. I like it. Saturday afternoon, vibes, Saturday afternoon, anyway.

SPEAKER_08 5:12

How are you? How have you been?

SPEAKER_07 5:15

You're killing me. Wait, no, how are you? Oh, how are you? It's so funny, guys, how this podcast is just like vibes. I think that that's just really funny. Um, yeah, we are we're doing better. We'll try to do better at having structure, but it's really vibes for now.

SPEAKER_08 5:35

This is structured to me. Is this not structured to you?

SPEAKER_07 5:38

Yeah, sure. Yeah, call it structure. Okay. How am I? Anyway, how are you? How have you been good since we last recorded?

SPEAKER_08 5:51

I have been really good. Um, I'm very happy at the moment. Um, and I've been watching this new show called Off Campus, and I just I'm only four episodes in, and I knew I was going to love it, which is why like I haven't been able to bring myself to watch it all these weeks because like it's it's giving me the same feeling that like forever gave me. I remember when I finished Forever and I finished Forever and immediately watched it again. So like I that's how I'm feeling about off-campus, and like my only takeaway, and I don't even know if it's off-campus that's making me like so happy, but my only takeaway is that first of all, I'm blushing like crazy. I want to be romanced, like, and if you don't know what off-campus is, it's it's a it's a college drama about um it's one of those like friends to love us type trope, you know. They both they make a pact where she helps the guy to ace the test and he helps her get this guy that she's been pining over. But obviously, the two of them are gonna fall in love with each other. But it's just like from jump, like the chemistry has been so like intense, and there's something about the way that his character is written, which is probably maybe why I'm so like I blush every time he's on the screen, because he's not like the typical like um college athletes that you would expect from all these American shoes. Like, yes, he still has those like traits, but there's something very like emotionally like attuned about him, and it's really sexy, and yeah, um, it's just the fact that he has created such like a safe space for her, and yeah, it at the end of I think it was episode three or episode four, I can't remember, where I'm just gonna say it if you haven't watched it, sorry, where she's like, Oh, she says to him, like, oh, I want you to make me orgasm. Yeah, she did, and and he was like, Oh, I don't like I don't think we should do this anyway. He now goes, she goes, I've only been able to make myself orgasm, and then he goes, show me I locked the fuck in in that scene.

SPEAKER_07 8:32

I said period Yeah, what we're about to do is this, yeah, yes, oh my gosh. I said fair, fair enough. Fair enough.

SPEAKER_08 8:46

I wasn't fair enough. Like, I couldn't take my eyes off the screen. I said, Oh, this is what we're doing. Okay, you guys have got me. Yeah, I'm so in. I'm I'm so shy. I can't stop blushing. Like I love love, you guys. I love romance. I do, I love like the early stages of like figuring out, like I love the early stages, not figuring out, but the early stages of realizing that you like someone and like the little things that you do when you when you realize that you do like them, but you're still trying to suss out if they like you. And obviously, it's easier when you're in a place like university or college where you guys are seeing each other quite regularly. Um, but like it's just it's so cute. And like I'm such a hopeless romantic, and I think that watching I've been watching rom-coms since maybe I was six, like so I have a very maybe very warped view of what like love and romance and all of that should be, but I that's why I continue to watch it, it continues to feed that like fantasy, uh guys no, honestly, I would say as cute, cute and like loving and sweet, whatever it is, and you know, obviously the guys are so hot, the girls are so hot, like everything is amazing.

SPEAKER_07 10:17

I think that it touches on some very, very interesting topics. It does. Well, not interesting, but for very serious topics, it does. Um, and I think that was also where it got me because I mean, like, I do love a good rom com, and I've watched, you know, especially the teenage ones. I love them. Um but when you know she revealed that thing that she had been going through, I was like, Yeah, oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_08 10:39

Which is which is why which is why that scene, the scene that I described, which is why that scene hit even more. Because I was like, she feels so comfortable to do that with him, despite all the stuff that she's gone through.

SPEAKER_07 10:56

Yeah, yeah, and you know, also him as well having gone through his own fair share of you know crazy things. I was like, okay, like we're having fun here, we're all in love, but like we're also addressing very serious topics and very real topics as well. And I just loved that they did that through this like rom-com. Um, so yeah, I it's like it got me. It got me. I didn't think it was gonna get me, but it got me like mad. I finished it in like one day. I think no, I I'd gone up to like episode four, and then I just finished everything in like one evening uh and binged the whole thing. Um, and I just can't wait for the second season, and I literally like want to be in that world again. Yeah, why am I not in that world? Like, why am I in this world? Yeah, real. When I go back into my world with my hockey players and Hannah and Ali and my drama girls, like I I don't want to be here right now. It's amazing. They cast in the so so well. That was the other thing I was gonna say.

SPEAKER_02 12:00

So um, like I just want to be romanced, that's all I ask for. Yeah, period.

SPEAKER_07 12:08

Like, oh gosh, yeah, it's not, and I feel like she even did her fair share of romancing. Because I'm thinking, I mean, that's that scene that you described, yeah, very, very like heartfelt, whatever. But then even when she did that thing when he was skating, oh, you haven't reached it.

SPEAKER_02 12:28

I'm not there yet, so I don't even know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_07 12:31

Okay, let me hold it back, let me hold it back. Oh no, you have so much more. I know, and that's why you haven't even scratched the surface.

SPEAKER_08 12:40

That's why I think that is why my heart. If you guys could see me, I haven't stopped smiling since I started talking about off-campus. Like, I think that is why my heart is so happy. Because after this, I'm going to balance. Like, I'm going to balance with a nice bowl of jello fries and watch off-campus. I cannot wait. I can't wait.

SPEAKER_07 13:01

What I would say is one of my friends, she was trying to watch this in her office, and I was just looking at her like in her office?

SPEAKER_08 13:08

Are you that is not suitable for work?

SPEAKER_07 13:10

I just want to catch up.

SPEAKER_05 13:11

I said, girl, what she was not watching, it's just a yeah. You cannot watch this in the workplace. That is not suitable.

SPEAKER_02 13:22

It's not suitable.

SPEAKER_07 13:24

Yeah, it's really not suitable at all. At all. I was also telling my MCM that he has to watch it because I made him watch Forever as well. Did he like Forever? I was just like, I just need you. He he thought it was okay. I think he secretly likes it, but he won't reveal. I think he's secretly, and I actually think he will secretly love off campus. Like he will binge it. But he will just tell me, oh, alright, this is cool. Like, watch it so you can be learning and jot jutting things down.

SPEAKER_02 13:54

Learning, are you saying that your MTM is not romantic?

SPEAKER_07 13:58

He's bloody romantic, yeah. Fool me water, baby.

SPEAKER_06 14:12

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_08 14:13

It's a joke.

SPEAKER_07 14:14

It's a joke.

SPEAKER_06 14:16

Sure.

SPEAKER_07 14:16

It's not funny to others. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_08 14:23

It's a joke, please, guys. Um, I want this MCM. I'm joking. Before you take this personally, I'm joking.

SPEAKER_07 14:30

We don't even listen to the podcast anymore, to be honest.

SPEAKER_08 14:34

So okay, that's fine then.

SPEAKER_07 14:37

Yeah. Anyway, anyway, anyway. Anyway. Um, moving on.

SPEAKER_08 14:42

How are you?

SPEAKER_07 14:44

How have you been? Oh wow, I thought you weren't gonna ask me. Oh, what's a senior podcast? Um, I'm good. I'm okay. The past two weeks have been a whirlwind. A whirlwind. To say the least, I can tell you guys that I am officially done with the National Youth Service Corps. Woo!

SPEAKER_01 15:12

Hallelujah!

SPEAKER_07 15:14

Praise the Lord. Thank you, Jesus. Hallelujah. And it's crazy because Unala has this one friend who did this thing and she's not finished. Yeah, and I messaged her the other day because I like I was in a bit of a like a sticky situation. And she was just like, Girl, I can't like I can't help you. Because I am still trying to resolve my own situation.

SPEAKER_08 15:36

But hers was worse than yours. Her situation was worse than you're gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_07 15:39

So hers was way worse than mine. So I'll explain it to you guys. Okay, so obviously, National Youth Corp. I mentioned this last episode, and I thought I would explain it. It's like a one-year mandate, not mandatory, but service that you should do. Um Nigerians should do. Um, and it's usually targeted at after university, right? So they will place you, you get a job, you get paid by the government, and also your job will pay you, blah blah blah. It's meant to like dis teach you discipline, teach you like how to be a better Nigerian, whatever, whatever, whatever. And like provide service to your to your country because you do like community work and stuff like that. So, like, yeah, maybe you can say its intentions are good, but as we all know, this is Nigeria, like things don't play out the way that they should be. So for me, it has been chaotic, it has been crazy. I you know, one can't one can call me a bougie koppa, I don't even mind I'll take it. All right, but bougie koppas are not meant to serve where I served in T or I don't even want to say it, but I don't even want to say it. I'm having trauma, but let's know I was serving in the lungu. In the lungu, I was not serving well the bougie koppas are serving in Via and Quiji. I was in the lungu. Bro, going there every month, looking at my life, and I let me tell you guys that there was one day where I went to this place and I sat there for seven hours. Seven hours. Because I'd caught in there. I think I got there at 8:30. And usually you do monthly clearance, you go out and thumbprint and whatever, and they sign your form. I got there at 8:30. I didn't leave that place till like maybe like 3-4, something stupid like that. I was like, Yeah, I'm not doing this with you people anymore.

SPEAKER_08 17:24

I'm not. But wait, wait. I'm actually But wait, why do you have like what took so long?

SPEAKER_07 17:30

Because basically, when you go there, you have to get a number, and that's your position in the queue for thumbprinting. And they have to do, and I think I got a thousand I was like a thousand and two hundred. That's ridiculous. And so obviously, I get there and I think they're only on like 400. And at that point in time, me, I was still trying to do, oh, let me just do this thing, let me try to do this thing the way, the normal way. But that day, seven hours, and bear in mind, time is money. I was just looking at myself like you mean something I sat down here for seven hours just to do a thumbprint, you must be joking. That's crazy. This cannot be my existence. I am a bougie copper, and I will be a bougie copper for the rest of my year. I called on my friend, I was like, bro, I am, and this is again, this is why it ended up being a bit weird at the end. I called on my friend, I was like, I'm not going back. I am not going back. And so the next month I didn't go, and it caused a bit of a problem because it meant I had an absence, and you're meant to be there like 12 months of the year, uh every every single month of the year. And if you're absence, it means that they extend your service. So I think I called my friend, I was like, you need to call somebody and sort this thing out because I'm not doing this like anymore. We called someone, it took a bit of a time, we called someone, blah blah blah. She spoke to whatever, whatever. Next thing you know, I'm going for five minutes every month.

SPEAKER_08 18:49

Can I can I pause? Can I pause you for a quick second? Yeah, there is nothing greater than having a friend, having a guy that gets shit done. Oh my being. It is the people, it is the sexiest traits. It is, and I 100%, it is so flipping sexy that it's I'm just gonna call you. Yeah, I need this done, and shit gets done.

SPEAKER_01 19:22

Oh yeah, yeah, like the fact that you even had a person to call to be like, yeah, um I'm not going back.

SPEAKER_08 19:33

So sort that out. I don't know, like I'm not going back. So I don't know, figure it out, but I'm not going back. Let me know once it's sorted. That's my dream life. That is my dream life.

SPEAKER_07 19:49

No, let me tell you that the level of my respect for my friend went through the roof. Like this, I even told him, I said this is my certificate, I should give it to you. Because if not for you, if not for you, I actually don't think I would have finished, bro. Having a friend that just is connected now. If that person is your man, hey, game over.

SPEAKER_02 20:13

Yeah, legit. Game over, legit.

SPEAKER_07 20:16

Game over. Like, what more you like? I called him and I was like, I'm not, like, I'm not doing that again. So I don't know who you need to talk to. But I am not doing that again. And he said, Don't worry, don't worry, don't worry. I got it. That's my dream lies. I don't know what the hell he did. I don't know who the hell he spoke to. I just know that when he gave me a number, he said, call her. And I called her, and next thing you know, I was going for five minutes every month. Five minutes, five minutes, five minutes. That's a dream. She understands. That's a dream. So it really changed the course of everything. Um, and then you know, it became a smoother experience for me, and blah blah blah. So lo and behold, it came to like passing out, you know, where they give you a certificate while you served. Oh because of this freaking absence that I had, and I had to go to the secretariat, which is the place your friend has been, you know, trying to sort her own problems out. In Abuja. No, Babs Animachow in Surillier. Okay. Yeah. No, it's not Yanop Paja. Yano Paja is where Camp is, by the way, which I also that's just a whole point. You're a bougie copper, we are. I am a bougie, you guys. This is the title of the episode, Bougie Copper. I'm sorry. Like, thank you for everything that you have done, Nigeria. Um, I am a bougie copper. Uh, so like there were a lot of things that were gonna happen. So when she told me that she's gonna extend me, I looked her dead in the eye and I said, Ma, there's no way. There's no way, ma. There is no way. See how God passed that red sea. You will pass today. There is no way. I am extending me. Can never be me. I looked her dead in the eye. I was like, Ma, um, she's gonna say, You're so silly. I said, Ma'am silly. She said, Ah, you're such a silly girl.

SPEAKER_06 22:11

Why do you say ma? I'm the silliest girl. It's me. Yeah, ma, I'm silly.

SPEAKER_05 22:18

I'm such a fool. Everything she called me. I said, Yes, it's me.

SPEAKER_07 22:28

I was like, babes, yeah. See, the thing is, I told her, I said, Ma, if I go and tell my people they're going to fire me, I won't have a job. I don't want to have money coming in. Ma, there's no way I can do extension. And you know, one thing I'll say, there's a last thing I'm gonna say on this. One thing about Nigeria, we all speak the same language.

SPEAKER_06 22:53

We all speak one language, one tone, yeah, one understanding. And I tell you, I spoke yesterday. I spoke, and she got it, and I got my certificates.

SPEAKER_07 23:18

Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, God. It is not me, it is the Father in heaven that helps me and gave me favor.

SPEAKER_08 23:26

I think that being being a Nigerian that has to do certain like Nigerian things, like for instance, having to do NYSC, such a unique experience. Um, because like Nigeria is such a like lawless society. Like this is Nigeria, but we all speak the same language. Like, yes, it's very funny, and like yes, we all do speak the same language. However, that sh like if people just followed things, like also the the clearance thing shouldn't take that long. Do you know what I mean? Like the process, the process is so like the process is not meant to be as long as it is, and yet it's so long, and then people have to resort to all these things because nothing works, and it's it trickles down from the top, from the top. So, yeah, like it's obviously it's funny. We love talking about it, but like it's also aggravating, and I can imagine that it's really irritating to have to do this thing for the government and nothing in it works. Like, but then you see you see your presidents, you see your governors, you see your ministers, you see your senators that are living lavish. And I'm just like, okay, so you guys have money to live lavish, but you don't have money to fix this thing that is forced upon people if they want to work in a Nigerian company or if they want to like it's it's so bizarre. No, it's so bizarre, it's really, really bizarre.

SPEAKER_07 24:54

It's really bizarre. And what I would say though, is like a lot of people benefit of this, so this the system and the whole thing is never going to go because they're just so people are feeding their families off of NYC. And you mean to tell me the thing, you want them to abolish this for what? Absolutely no way. And I think it's if you ever move to Nigeria, or if anyone is ever thinking of moving to Nigeria, it's one of the ways for you to really understand how this country operates.

SPEAKER_08 25:25

I I have learned so much. I'm putting it to you. I ain't never gonna do no NYSC. I think if I was going to do it, I think I've passed the age. I don't like if if I'm going to move to Nigeria, like the the things I'm going to be doing there, hopefully, I'm assuming I know, won't require NYSC. I remember one of my mom's friends or my auntie, when she moved back to Nigeria and she was going to work at a bank, she had to go and do NYSC. She was in her 40s and she was just lamenting.

SPEAKER_05 26:00

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_08 26:00

Day in, day out. And I just thought, and she actually went to camp. My friend told me about her camp experience, and honestly, that for me was what scarred me. She stayed in camp for one day, and she said when she got when she got there, somebody stole her mattress.

SPEAKER_02 26:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_08 26:20

And then slapped her face for asking who stole my mattress.

SPEAKER_05 26:26

God. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_07 26:29

Oh my goodness. Not funny. Yeah, no, no, no, no, but the level of like the things I've seen in this point here that have just hum like humbled me. Yeah. I'm just like, yeah, yeah, fair. And you know, all things said, I'm kind of glad I was put where I was put because it really showed me like I had to figure out everything for myself. I was not in a space where I could like ask someone, oh, please can you put me in contact with the person that used that time that because no one I knew had served where I served, except for my cousin. But even still, like he served a long time ago. No one I knew had served where I served. So there was nothing. It was like, babes, you are going to figure out this thing on your own. And you need to wise up the amount of people that won't girl, she will just be like, get back. She'll be telling me, get back, where do you think you're going? I'll stand, I will look at her, I'm like, I'm going to go and speak to this person. Cannot speak to her, get back. Who do you think you are? See this girl, idiot. Like the insult that you chop, hey, the shame, everything. But you chase it, you don't have to be like, I came here for one mission, for one thing and one thing only. The day my LGR was making me go up and down. Go and write this, go and write this, go and write this. Only for her never to send that thing that I wrote at least five times. That's insane. I wrote that letter five times and she never sent it. Why? I said humbly. I don't know. Help me ask her. She lost my file. She was just doing anyhow. Anyway, shout out to her, man. I don't even want to give any shout out to her. Shout out to her. That's my that's my girl.

SPEAKER_08 28:15

Question question for you. Do you feel like obviously we know that you are the bougie copper, whatever? Um, but while you were there, do you do you feel like one you understand why the government makes people do this? That's my first question. And then I think my second question, not I think, but my second question is that like um, did you I don't I don't know how to phrase this, but like essentially you were able to call someone who was able to just help you like sort things out, but like you were seeing people who probably didn't have that um Yeah interesting, interesting.

SPEAKER_07 29:03

I kind of get the gist of where you're going. What I would say is um so to answer your question, do I see why the government does this? I would say to be very honest with you, no, not anymore.

SPEAKER_08 29:18

And that's a shame. No, that's such a shame.

SPEAKER_07 29:21

I I don't see it, I don't get it. I don't know what it is that people and again, like I am the buggy copper. There are a lot of gaps that I missed that maybe you can say like okay, you didn't get the full experience, so da da da. But from it, like what are we trying to put out into what are what are we trying to um and how are we trying to raise our young people in Nigeria based on this service thing? Like we are no, it I don't I don't know what people are getting out of it in terms of like discipline or like con being a better contributor to society and things like that, like learning what it means to be Nigerian, like Nigerian identity or whatever. Like I don't see any of that happening from my own personal experience. I see a lot of like abuse of power, mistreatment of young people, like absolute piss poor treatment of people. I don't want to say certain things, but like yes, extra shot, yeah. Um and just like a lot of cock and go, you know what I'm saying, basically. Now, what I would say though is a lot of young Nigerians who are in less privileged positions really, really, really aspire for NYC. First of all, it is like uh my it was only doing it that I really understood. Like it is seen as, especially if you are now baby, you come from another state and you're now in Lagos. First of all, it's like wow, you've really done something, you've changed, like potentially changed trajectory for your family. Yeah, you know, that you grew up in this place and now you're not you're now working in Lagos, and you can use that as an opportunity to really enter and whatever. So, like a lot of people benefit from from that, and a lot of people respect the NYSC institution. Like people want to be coppers, they want to serve, they want to go to camp, they want to be part of it, they want to take their pictures and show everybody that I serve they their certificate is probably being hung in their house. So it still has that level of like prestige for like others, right? The money as well, the second thing I would say the money that they're giving people, a lot of them I know, see on a normal basis. No one is giving you that kind of money on a monthly basis consistently to live, right? And it's it goes a long way when you're outside of Lagos, yeah, right. Lagos, maybe it's not gonna go that far. So just having that steady stream of income that's coming from this thing, it goes a long way for people. I will not even like hold her and they increase the money recently. Again, I will not I'll put my hand up and say it's helping people, it's really, really helping. I know the way people depend on their allowance monthly for a lot of things, so yeah, I will give that it's still seen as a prestigious and like reputable thing for others for a lot more people than you would think. I would say, particularly outside of Lagos, and because I went to camp and I was telling them I I basically got an exit out from camp because I was sick. Anyway, I got an exit from camp. Um, so I didn't have to stay there. There was one girl who was crying because they told her that she's sick, she needs to go to hospital, and she was like, No, she wants to stay. Oh wow, that she can't go, that she needs to be here, she wants to be here. Wow, so that's just you know one example to illustrate that this thing is still means a lot to a lot more people, even though the institution itself is not serving its purposes, its purpose, yeah.

SPEAKER_08 33:00

Interesting. I mean, yeah, I don't know. Um, I mean it's interesting to like hear your experience or to like hear part of your experience, and like um I I think that yeah, it does mean a lot to a lot of people, um, and it's easy for us to look at NYSC from a very privileged POV. Um because like some of us have the option of just not doing it, right? Like I can be like, I don't want to do it, um, because at the end of the day, I'm also British. So if I'm not gonna get a job here, I will go back to my other home country.

SPEAKER_07 33:41

To my other country, exactly.

SPEAKER_08 33:43

But some people don't actually have that option, and like if you do want to work for a Nigerian company in certain sectors, you need to have NYSC. So it sucks that like there's all these things going on, and I it really pisses me off when like people uh and I see it a lot in Nigeria about like the abuse of power, like like for like just even something as little as like when you land in the airport and the immigration officers are talking to you anyhow, and it's like that's the only time that they have to show. Do you get what I mean? Because they are probab they are also probably receiving it from like their own or girl or whatever, so it sucks. Um, but I don't know, I just I just I wish that like NYSC overall just meant something. Does that make sense? Like I wish that like at the end of your experience of it, you could have been like, you know what? Like it was a shit time, but like I completely understand why they made me do that, and I feel like it's made me a better Nigerian citizen, you know, it's made me understand Nigeria more. You know, I just feel I wish that there was something to it so that it does so that it now doesn't feel like all of this thing that you went through for an entire year was a waste of time. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_07 35:02

Yeah, like yeah, yeah. You can you can at least for someone like me, you can't call it a waste of time. Yeah, you can't really call it a waste of time.

SPEAKER_08 35:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 35:11

Like I just wanted to I kind of just wanted to see and experience it and like get the certificate just in case, you know, who knows where you might need it in the future. Um, and even for work, like I low key kind of need it. Um, so I also just needed to do it. So yeah, but it's a a a bloody waste of time. Oh let them let them know let them not come back actually. My house.

SPEAKER_08 35:40

Also, another question, random question. When you because one, Nigeria is still analog, which I think is so dumb, right? And everything has to be written on paper and all this stuff. When you have to write like your address and stuff, are you putting your actual home address? Or your other home address?

SPEAKER_07 36:00

I tend to do the other home address, you know, my country home in Isolo. Yeah, that's where I tend to put the other address in, because we do have you know the country houses there. Um I don't tend to put this one here, which I think is wise because yeah, yeah, yeah. I think so. I think so too. Even sim same things with you know phone numbers and stuff, like when any Nigerian institution is asking me for my phone number. Yeah, like what are you doing with my phone number? Yes, N-I-N or a same card, king, or whatever. What do you want with my phone number and what do you want with my email address?

SPEAKER_08 36:40

So you should always have backups hundred percent, hundred percent. This actually reminds me of a story I was telling my friend yesterday. Apparently, I I'm known for calling my friend someone on this podcast, so I need to start referring to people as my friends. You know, just so that they are aware that I am saying friend, because people have called me out to be like you're always saying someone, you always say, you know, I spoke to someone.

SPEAKER_06 37:05

Someone somebody.

SPEAKER_08 37:08

Um, where when I went to go and get my new sim, this was like maybe in 2022 or something. I went with Bank and I law a little etel to go and get a new sim. And honestly, etc. You must crumble. Nobody hates etel more than me. I hate them with a passion. Like I hate, I hate, I hate etel. Like, I can't even let me even just stop. But honestly, I hate you. Yeah, oh um, so I went to go get a new sim. Um, but I was getting a new sim. I can't remember what banking and rally were doing. So then they took me to one other room, and I had to fill out one form. The guy that is taking the info is now asking me to pick. Do you do you mind if I take your phone number? I do mind. Do you mind if I take your phone number? Um, so I can so I can call you. I mind, I mind.

SPEAKER_02 38:11

Is that what they sent you here to do?

SPEAKER_08 38:13

Is that the job? What? I mind like leave me and like what are we talking about?

SPEAKER_07 38:20

You know, somebody customer service is messaging you. Right. Hey, beautiful.

SPEAKER_08 38:24

I literally said to him, I said, uh, I have a I have a boyfriend. He goes, but you know, I didn't say I want to be a boyfriend. I just want us to be friends. I don't want to be your friend, bro. I don't like I I'm not looking, I now said I'm not looking for new friends. He said, Ah, you never had a friend like me. I don't want to find out.

SPEAKER_07 38:44

I don't want to find out. Is that what this is that what they said she did? Is that your job? Is this what is this part of your job? Like that you need to hit hit on women.

SPEAKER_08 38:53

Like, are you serious? Although I do like, I mean, as ridiculous as that scenario was, I do like that he asked me, Do you mind if I take your number?

SPEAKER_06 39:04

I mind, yeah, fair enough.

SPEAKER_08 39:06

And I said, I mind, fair enough, like, please, no, no, fair enough.

SPEAKER_07 39:12

Unless he asked, like, at least he used, don't contact me, at least he used, but yeah, um, it's crazy, man. But I'm just glad it's done. Yeah, well done, yeah. It's over, and congratulations, and congratulations to everyone who also has passed out. So, was that like a party? Did you get their service? Did they throw you guys a party? Rocks, oh serious rocks. Wow, oh no, they're giving out jolo fries and meat. Everybody did you eat it? They even had DJ. First of all, did I go for the T was her walk? Did I post on a Thursday?

SPEAKER_08 39:52

I haven't another question. How did you manage, like, did did your office know that when you were doing NYSC? Um, and how did you manage that like with work, like having to go and do all this like thumbprints and all this kind of stuff?

SPEAKER_07 40:07

No, they knew they understood, um, because again, I needed to do it. Um, but my situation was a bit odd. Um, but what I would tell my managers like at the start of a project was like, oh, I need to every month I would put a calendar blocker because I would usually go in the morning and it's on a Friday. Thankfully, I was in special CDS, which means you don't need to come for weekly CDS, you can only go once you you only need to go once a month and stuff, and like my friend had helped me with something, so like it was very straightforward. It was only once the commitment was like once a month from the hours of 8 a.m. till like I would block a larger chunk of time because sometimes I would wake up late and like go late. But like within the early morning, I would just need to go there and like some print. Right. So that was like the only major commitment. Um, and most of the time I would tell them beforehand, so it was fine, like they knew and it was they were cool with it, especially if it's a Nigerian manager. They're just like, Okay, yeah, fine, go and do your thing. Um, so it kind of worked out well. Nice actually worked out really well. But this past two weeks, that one, I was going. I went, I think I went there at least three times.

SPEAKER_02 41:13

Jeez.

SPEAKER_07 41:14

That's how crazy this whole thing was. Yeah, that was not cool. That was not fun. But anyway, thank god it's all over. Now let's see what my third year in Lagos is gonna give. Is this your third year? Let's see. It's coming up to my third year. Oh wow. I'm in. You're in my third year. I was gonna say. Wow. No, I'm not in my third year. I'm yeah, I'm in between my second and my third year, yeah. Whatever.

SPEAKER_02 41:37

Wow.

SPEAKER_07 41:38

That means.

SPEAKER_02 41:40

Yeah. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_07 41:41

So many things I'm glad I don't have to deal with.

SPEAKER_02 41:43

What do you want it to bring?

SPEAKER_07 41:44

One thing I was gonna um great question.

SPEAKER_04 41:51

Cash. Money.

SPEAKER_07 41:55

The first word that came to my okay, it was from raw cash. First thing that came to my mind was like clarity. That was actually the first thing that came to my eye. Like just clarity. Um yeah, I just think like just moving, moving forward, moving in the right direction with a clear understanding of like what it is I need to do in this world. Yeah, I still don't know where I want to live, you guys. I still don't know where I want to live in this world, but I don't think I need to have that answer um just yet. I think I can figure it out as time passes, as time goes.

SPEAKER_08 42:28

I mean, I don't I don't know where I want to live either, and I'm 30, so you know.

SPEAKER_07 42:34

Yeah, exactly. I feel like at some point in time, we're all just gonna have to I genuinely feel like we're all just gonna have to be like, oh shh, okay, this is our lives now. Yeah. Like we're just gonna have to accept this is our lives. And I feel like a lot of us that are like, we don't know what we want to do, we don't, we don't, we don't know where we want to live, and blah blah blah. We're like living in denial. And then we're gonna be 35 and be like, I literally live in Lagos, I live in London, I live in America, like whatever it is. Yeah, and it's like, okay, this is my life. Yeah, um, but I think like up until, and I mean this is maybe a delulu thought, but I feel like up until that first child comes, man, I'm gonna live in Deluland. I will live in Delululand. Probably the best. I'd still be telling myself, I don't know, I don't know where I want to live. Probably the best.

SPEAKER_08 43:20

But I think I think it changes. Like I like even if we look at like our parents who have shuttled between like London and Nigeria and have moved around, like I think I think it it moves, like it changes a lot. Like, and like you said, I think when you have children, it also will change things. Like, you know, you life is dynamic ultimately, and I think it's important for us Yeah, because you can't raise yeah oh to enjoy just like where we are. Because like I find that I'm const I'm constantly thinking about like the future and constantly placing happiness in like some random thing in the future. That hasn't even happened, or I don't know if it will happen. And I did this a lot in my 20s, um, where like I was pushing happiness forward, and I wasn't really like enjoying life for what it was, yeah. Um, and where I was, and I really feel like a lot of people do that, and you really just need to like this is where I am now. I'm going to enjoy this now. If there is something that you want, obviously you can work towards it, but your happiness shouldn't be placed in that. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_07 44:30

I love that. I love I actually got so much from what you just said. Thank you so much for that. Um, what I was gonna say was it's yeah, I agree, like it's still very fluid, right? But there's something about having a home and it tickles my brain a little bit, like having a home that you have created or like built for yourself, and again, it could be you're renting it or whatever, but like this is my space, this is my living room, and I've designed it how I wanted it to be. This is my dining table, like I do you know, dinners, dinner clubs every m every month with my friends, right? I have friends that come and stay with me, like this is my room, this is my little cocoon. And I feel like there's just something about that, like just having your own space and having your own like little like home that is important to me. And like I don't know where I want that to be, and so like I just feel so unsettled to an extent. And like, don't get me wrong, I have a very comfortable home like I'm living in. Again, my own cocoon is my bedroom, which I like create into what it is, but I just think like you get to an age where you're just kind of like, I want my space, like I want a home, even if it's a transitional home, I want a home and I want to feel like okay, I am doing something, like I am here for a year, I'm here for six months, or whatever, whatever it is. Um, and I think like when you're living at home, you just don't you can't you don't get that feeling.

SPEAKER_08 46:12

I had this discussion with my friend like three, four weeks ago. Um and she was asking me, like, what is my motivation for wanting to like move out?

SPEAKER_07 46:22

And I was like, I just feel which I think I can't lie, you need to move out at some point.

SPEAKER_08 46:26

Yeah, I do. You need to move out. But I live a very I live a very crushty life. Like my cocoon, like you said, my cocoon is my room, right? Yeah, and I have curated my space in such a way that like when I enter my room, I just I feel like peace. I feel at home. Like I can always tell when someone has been in my room because they never put things back the way it's supposed to be, or just I can always tell. Yeah, I always know when my sister has been in my room, I always know when my mom has been in my room. Like, I can always tell. Um, and so she was asking me, like, what is your motivation for wanting to move out? And I was like, I feel like you reach a certain age where there is a serious desire for just like your own space. And I think that when I think back on like a lot of my friends um and like family members and stuff, like when we all left Nigeria like after secondary school to come to London to do like A-levels uni, their families didn't move with them, so they had to find their own homes in London, right? So they've always had that opportunity to like have their own space. I never had that because after I finished secondary school, my mum and my sister had already moved back the year prior. So um when I finished secondary school and I came back to London, um, we had a house here, and I was just I was just living at home. Even when I went to uni, I didn't live alone in uni. I lived in student accommodation, which meant that I had flatmates my whole three years of uni. Um, even when I went to do my masters, I had like so I've never really had like just my own space. And so I find that sometimes when I have this conversation with like my friends who live alone, they don't understand what I'm what I'm saying because they've always had their own space, and there is there is there is like an independence that you get when you've just had to just like do your own thing, or when you've just been able to do that, you know. I like I remember when we'll be doing like our A levels, and like they'll be lamenting because their parents are coming for two weeks, and I'm like, bro, I live at home, like it's two weeks, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 48:43

It's nothing exactly.

SPEAKER_08 48:45

So when she was asking me that, I was just like, it's really I'm very fearful of leaving like my parents' roof and going straight to living with someone else, like when I get married, yes, and not having that like that time in between where I have been able to curate a space for myself. I and I'm not I'm not even saying that like it needs to be that I live alone. I'm open to living with family, I'm open to living with friends, like I'm I'm open to living with some with someone that is close close enough to me. Like I would live with you, I'd live with my sister, you know, that kind of thing.

SPEAKER_07 49:24

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_08 49:25

But like I think there is there is something that I feel like I'm missing in not having been able to curate an entire space. So yes, I have curated my room, but like, and don't get me wrong, like if I want to invite my friends to my house, I can. My parents are not, they don't really give a toss. But it's like my the living room is designed the way in which my dad likes it, you know. The kitchen is designed the way in which my mom likes it. Everything like the cutlery, like you know, just just little, you know, just little it's still their house. Yeah, it's still their house. Yeah, so I just feel like I don't I haven't had that, like I don't know, I just that freedom to just really explore like my own interests in in a home outside of my bedroom, yeah, you know, exactly.

SPEAKER_07 50:21

Yeah, I completely get you, and I think that that's one of the reasons why again it's just there's just still that element of being unsettled. Because you know, I know that here I'm in my parents' home. Let's say I decide I'm going to move back to the UK, I'm potentially going to my parents' house and vacation. Do you understand? So it never really feels like you're um what's it called? There's a term for it, but like laying down foundation anywhere.

SPEAKER_02 50:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 50:49

Because when you're not living in your own home and it's not your own responsibility, guy, you can open whenever you want to. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm going to America tomorrow. Yeah. And I'm moving there for six months. Like, yeah, bye. Yeah. You know, it doesn't really feel like you're like laying down roots. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. In in a in a sp a specific place.

SPEAKER_02 51:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 51:08

Um, so yeah, I think I'm I wonder if like this is what the next year of being in Lagos will feel like. I don't know. I don't think I'm ready to leave my parents' home yet. But let's see if maybe in the future. She was she was asking something that I would consider.

SPEAKER_08 51:22

She was asking me if that is like my main motivator for moving to Lagos, and I was like, I it's definitely not. Um, because again, if I was to move to Lagos, I wouldn't be living alone.

SPEAKER_07 51:33

Um I also wouldn't want to live alone.

SPEAKER_08 51:35

Exactly. Um, but I do think that like maybe um there is a serious, like just desire for change. I just want to like shake things up, like I just want to do something different, yeah, you know, and I've always I mean I've I lived in Lagos before and I've always wanted to just like experience it again as an adult.

SPEAKER_07 51:58

Um yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_08 52:00

So for sure.

SPEAKER_07 52:01

Oh, I had one question I wanted to ask. Um and it was a video I saw. Um, again, the pot spirit has that us here, guys.

SPEAKER_06 52:10

Yeah, we're fine.

SPEAKER_07 52:12

Um it was a video I saw about like independence and like being an independent girl, and I think it was a guy that was saying, like, oh, one thing about the independent girl is is that like if you do not do that thing that they ask you to do in the next 30 seconds, they're doing it themselves. Yes, like they're figuring it out themselves. That's me. They they are not you if you are gonna take five minutes to go and figure out even one minute to figure out what the answer is, baby, you're late. Yes, you're lit. And I have I haven't resonated with something as hard as I did when I saw that video. I literally was sending around to everybody, like guys, like if there is a way I can be described, it's this. Yes, I just like if I am sharing something with you and I require your help, support, or whatever it is, I have actually like first of all, it has taken a lot because most of the time I want to figure it out myself and try and like come up with the solution myself. It's first taken me a lot to even open my mouth to come and say, and second of all, it is now not for you to delay the solution. Do you understand what I'm saying? Because I could have done it myself and I would have done it myself. If you guess what I need, right? So that you can help me accelerate the answer because I cannot get it done by myself, right? And I just think it's one of those things when people are like, oh, you just do, you don't really like tell people things, you just kind of figure things out on your own and you just make the decisions on yourself. And it's just because, like, bro, when you're trying to make or when you're having to in a space where you have to like make a decision, I have to now explain to you which is going to take a time. And that's annoying, yeah. And it's annoying to me, yeah, because I don't have 30 minutes. Yeah, I kind of need this thing done now. And like this thing happens to me all the time. Like, all the all all the time. I'll ask people like, oh, is there a way you can help me? They'd be like, Okay, so have you considered doing yes, I have. Have you thought about I have? I have like, can you help me? Um, and I just wanted to like get your thoughts on like what it is like to be an independent girl, and if that like, how can someone help someone who's the independent girl and just like figures everything? How can you best how can someone best support you? And it's not romantically, I'm talking about friends, I'm talking about everything. Like, how does it feel to be an independent girl, and how can someone support you best?

SPEAKER_08 54:38

Jesus Christ, how can someone support me best? I don't know the answer to that. Banke and I talk about this thing all the time because I think both of us have been so I'm not speak for her, but we do speak about this a lot. But we're so used to having to do things for ourselves. Like, if I want something, I'm going to go and get it. If I need something done, I'm just gonna do it because it's really aggravating, like you said. Um like a really good example, and this is really trivial, but like if I'm getting ready, like this is this is a really trivial example, right? But my sister and I are getting ready in the same room, right? And my baking powder is on the other side of the room, and I say to her, like, uh, can you please pass me the baking pan? And she doesn't do it that second. First of all, when I'm already irate, right? Because I'm like the fact that I'm even asking, I'm asking you because I'm like, I I I like I'm just I want your help, da da da. But then you haven't done it in, and I'm just like, well, the fact that I've asked you has now taken time away from when I could have gone to go and get it. And then it's just like, you see, this is why I don't ask people to do shit because I'm like, I would have just like I would have done it, we wouldn't have had a conversation, da-da-da. Again, this is a really trivial example. Trivial example, I understand, but it's like I just find it very annoying if you ask someone to do something and they just don't do it there and then, and it's also an insane request, by the way, right? Like it's an insane request of us to expect the other person to drop whatever they are doing to respond to you there and then, yeah, it's actually mad, yeah, yeah. Um, yeah, so I also think that um as an independent person, you need to, I don't know, maybe manage your expectations. Manage your expectations or just do the thing yourself, which is what we are accustomed to doing, right? But how can someone best help me? The answer, the answer sounds really insane, right?

SPEAKER_07 56:53

But love it. Let's hear it.

SPEAKER_08 56:56

You should anticipate my needs.

SPEAKER_04 56:59

Ah, you went where my brain went. Right. So you actually went where my brain went.

SPEAKER_08 57:05

I don't mean like this obviously in a romantic setting, but I also think in if in a friendship setting, in a in a familial setting, whatever. Yeah, I can sense if I'm with you, right? I can sense when you are about to be overstimulated. I can feel it. And I'm like, what do you need? How can I help? Like, it's just by knowing someone, right? So like Laulu is in the middle of wedding planning, she's very stressed. Yeah, and I will just message her, what do you need? How can I help? Right? I think that it doesn't take much to anticipate someone's needs, but I think people think that it is a much grander thing than it than it is.

SPEAKER_07 57:58

It needs to be.

SPEAKER_08 57:59

But if you know me well enough, you should know that like this situation, whatever the situation is, if we are in a situation, is gonna piss her off. It's that's gonna annoy her. So, how can I, as someone who knows this person well enough, um, like help? Do you get what I mean? So, like, for instance, no, I understand I don't like flying, I hate flying. Um I get very anxious when it comes to flying. So if I'm flying with my sister, my sister can sense when I start talking too much when we're at the airport, she can sense that I'm getting nervous. So she'll just say to me, it's okay, relax. Like, it'll be fine. You need to calm down.

SPEAKER_07 58:44

Like that's so sweet, it's okay, right?

SPEAKER_08 58:48

Um but like if I'm traveling alone, I have to do the work to like tell my brain that like it's okay, you fly all the time, da da da, da da da da.

SPEAKER_01 58:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 58:57

So the only way that someone can best help me to sum up this really long uh ramble was No, I love it. I honestly think that you need to anticipate my needs, and I know that that sounds like a crazy thing, but it's also it's all it's it's a reciprocal thing as well. Like, I'm not expecting you to only anticipate, but I'm doing it for you as well. Like if I can tell exactly that this thing is about to annoy you, or this thing is gonna stress you out, or like you need this thing done, I will just help you get it done. Yeah, you know what I mean? Or like how can I help you get it done? There's certain things that like like if like if a friend is like stressed at work and you're telling me that you're stressed at work, I'm asking you how can I help, right? But like I can't really help with the work. I don't work in your field, so I can't necessarily help in with the work. But maybe there's something else that I can do to take the load off. Do you get what I mean?

SPEAKER_07 59:56

Yeah, do you understand? So it's just like Do you understand? Like, it's not that hard, and it just sometimes it just drives me insane. Like something as small, I I think it's also building on what you said, it's remembering what this person like remembering that thing that has been annoying that person. Yes. So like one of my closest friends, um, she like I I broke my Apple Watch and my Apple Watch, I've had it for five years. It's so sentimental to me. I broke the face of it. But the thing about me is that like, look, if the thing is still functioning, I'm still gonna use it, right? Um, and I have this really bad habit, like, yes, I like to get things done, but like I have it if I like if it's not routined in my like life right now, it's gonna take me a time, a long time to get the thing done. So like I won't go and actively go and look up for solutions to fix my watch. I might I'll do it when I have decompressed everything in my current routine and I have time. That's just how I function. And like she does this thing where I maybe we're on the phone when it happened, and I'm like, damn, I broke my watch, blah blah blah. I'm not joking, every single week she'll be like, Do you want me to fix this? Are you sure? Like, I've got this show, like I know where I can get it done. Like, no, and I'll be like, no, no, no, no, no. She'll message again, and it's so random. Like, she'll just be like, Ay sure we shouldn't buy you another Apple Watch. Like, I can buy it for you, don't worry.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:17

And I'm like, That's really sweet.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:19

Just being seen in that way, yeah. And I've gotten to the point where I'm over it. It's like the face of the watch is broken, like whatever. But she knows I wear this thing every single day. It's in every like literally all my outfit pictures, like I am always wearing my watch because I love to count my steps and whatever on track. But you know that this thing is so meaningful. You carry my that matter on your head for me so that I don't have to like deal with that, and that is just like so small, but goes such a long way. It's not like we have fixed the watch or anything, but I know that like if I was to message her and be like, you know what, please give me that solution. She has it laid out this is the person we're going to call, give me this, let me send it to this person, blah blah blah blah blah. And you're just like, thank you for helping me just like resolve something that's been on my mind and is important to me. Do you understand? And I just wish, like, more people taking what we're saying, and like taking the example that I gave as well, it's not as difficult. I don't think it's true, it's just about caring, yeah, and like really, really seeing this person. Like, people are always telling me, like, oh, how can I help you? Are always like talking about how your stress will work and burnt out and blah blah blah. And like, I don't have a solution to tell you, like, I'm I'm tired, like, I don't know what you want me to do to say, like, oh, can you buy me um food or something like that? Like, I'm just tired. So, how about you put yourself and this is what I do I put myself in that person's shoes. This person has told me that they're tired. What can I do that will help make them less tired? Yeah, for example, one of my friends, she was complaining a lot had happened, blah blah blah blah blah. I said, you know what? Next week, Friday night, pen it down, we're doing a rest day. Don't worry, just show up to the house. Food was there, drinks were there, like everything. Just we're going to talk, we're just going to rest. I have another friend, she does this thing where she says, like, let's have a non-verbal day. Like, how about we have a non-verbal day? Just beat each other's present talk.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:16

So into that.

SPEAKER_07 1:03:16

Just sit down.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:17

I'm so into that.

SPEAKER_07 1:03:19

You just need to think about what it is I can do if you really care about this person and you really care about how they're feeling, and like it, you know, it's affecting you as well. Like, you think of solutions, so it's not that hard. And I feel like for me in particular, I'm saying this. Anyone who wants to come and pursue it, I've just given you. Oh, we have just shared how what it is that you can do to set yourself apart. Hello. Okay. Just giving you the I've just given you the opportunity. I'm giving you the blueprints.

SPEAKER_08 1:03:48

Are they listening to this podcast?

SPEAKER_07 1:03:50

They are listening. Okay. Next thing you know, somebody will be your DM saying, Oh, I have these pills that you can use when you're flying that will distress you. Should I send it to you? Do you understand? Or hey, I figured out a solution for your job problems.

SPEAKER_08 1:04:07

Honestly, if you can do that, I can marry you on the score.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:12

I swear. I have a job ready for you.

SPEAKER_08 1:04:15

Period. Honestly, anything you want, I'll give you. No.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:20

I just think like if someone was to pursue you, if they can really do it, they will stand out and they will set themselves apart. So yeah. Just give those like a nice blueprint. So funny.

SPEAKER_08 1:04:31

Um, when I lived in LA and I was going out with this guy, um, I remember I had just gotten rejected from a job that I really wanted. And I was so sad. Like, I was so sad. I I remember I called my mom, I was crying. My mum was like, it's okay. Like she was like, girl, it's just a job. Like, it's okay. But you know, at that point in time, I had I really had my heart set on not leaving LA. So I think it was just I think it was just like a crushing reality that, like, okay, this is this is not gonna happen for me. And he, I guess, noticed that I was really sad and upset, whatever. And he was like, Okay, I know that you don't want to talk about how you're feeling, so this is what you're going to do instead. And he sent me like a an itinerary of how it's of how I was going to spend every hour. And he was like, Okay, so for the first um 9 to 10am, you're gonna go for a walk. And when you come back from that walk, you're gonna shower, and when you shower, you're gonna order lunch. And he gave me his card, he was like, You're gonna order lunch, you do this, and then when you come back, you're gonna do this. Then you need to just sit on your balcony and just like think, and then you come back, and then you're gonna do it. And he had set out like wow every single thing that I was going to do. And I was just like, I didn't realize like how much I needed that in that time to just not like and it was it's just it's those things, it's The little things, right? Yep. But it's it's it's that like anticipating that okay, this girl is sad, like this thing is a lot on her. Maybe she doesn't want us to talk about how she feels about the whole thing again. Let's do something else. And like obviously it didn't work. Um, fuck him. But um but I didn't know.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:21

Well, thank you for the ride, yeah.

SPEAKER_08 1:06:23

But it was really sweet and thoughtful, and it was like finally like an opportunity where I don't have to constantly have my brain on 100 thinking about how am I going to have to solve how am I gonna have to make myself feel better?

SPEAKER_07 1:06:39

Yeah, feel better. Oh gosh, but you know, life is dynamic. Life is really dynamic.

SPEAKER_08 1:06:46

Life is dynamic.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:48

Anyway, we have come to the end of the day. We definitely have not been a fantastic podcast.

SPEAKER_08 1:06:52

We definitely have not because I have a little rant for y'all.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:56

Oh my days! Can you park it for next week?

SPEAKER_08 1:07:00

No, it's gonna be quick. It's just it's a quick rant. On today's episode of Inola Last Corner, I want to talk about shoddy business practices and how new age waxers um need to go back to school. You're probably wondering, what are you talking about? I think that it's insane that someone whose job is it is to wax people's vagines, aka vaginas, yeah, um, posts said vaginas on the interwebs. So imagine you go to your your waxer, right? You know, you get you get a wax, you're having a good old time, you go home, you're scrolling on TikTok, you see a vagine. You see a vagine, you're thinking, hey, that looks mighty familiar. Only for it to be yours. Exactly. I have that exact beauty spot in that exact spot. Yeah. Don't you think that's a bit weird? I don't think, I don't think now I understand that we are using social media as a means of getting new customers. However, as a potential customer, I don't want to see the the people you've waxed before. Can you not show me their legs? I don't need to see their vaginas. I can see their legs, I can see I can see their underarms, I can see their arms. Why are you putting people's vagines on the internet? Why? Why? Why? Also, it's a jump scare that I'm scrolling on TikTok, minding my goddamn business, and the next thing I'm seeing is someone's vagine. Is that okay? Is that okay? Is that okay? I think that we need we need to go back to like just like and like I think someone needs to write like a handbook on just like how to manage a business. Um because I do not like I do not think that that is okay.

SPEAKER_07 1:08:54

Um I just there's no world in which that is okay. I mean, I don't even think I need to see to know whether or not you're a good waxer.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:04

No, I can just I can just read reviews. I don't need to see it.

SPEAKER_08 1:09:08

I don't I don't need to see it. They'll not be posting it, they'll not be like, oh, look at this. So fresh and so clean, smooth. What are you telling me? Why are you telling me? Why are you telling me?

SPEAKER_07 1:09:19

Anyway, also like the people who are uh giving them consents to do that are crazy.

SPEAKER_08 1:09:24

Yes, insane, insane, and that's why I stick to my you know my little um Pakistani babe in Ealing Broadway. We have a great understanding. There's nobody's asking, nobody's bringing any stupid phone. I don't I don't need to do a day in the life. Follow me to do to to wax six people. I don't I don't need to see that. I actually don't I actually don't need to see that.

SPEAKER_07 1:09:50

Yeah, we don't need to see that.

SPEAKER_08 1:09:51

You know, if you're a lash tech, no problem, because we actually need to see the lashes. I don't need to see people's visions to know that you can wax. I don't. I don't anyway. It's weird. Well, see, Winana's corner was very quick, too.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:03

It was very quick, and it was like I just don't understand the algorithms that you have going on because like from the Etsy witch to this, I'm sorry. I don't be seeing these things.

SPEAKER_08 1:10:16

I see all I see all, but also I spend like 12 hours on TikTok a day.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:22

Yeah, fair enough.

SPEAKER_08 1:10:23

I don't think it's up to 12, but I spend a lot of time on TikTok.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:26

I have to put a timer on myself. I think I have to do like two hours max.

SPEAKER_08 1:10:31

Like all I do is like if I'm not on TikTok, I'm on LinkedIn.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:34

So my god, now I need to put a I need to put a limit on my LinkedIn, it's embarrassing.

SPEAKER_08 1:10:40

I love LinkedIn.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:41

Because the way I'll just be going on there and I'll be like, I love LinkedIn.

SPEAKER_08 1:10:45

I actually think LinkedIn also just as a way to great way to end this podcast, but LinkedIn is a great dating app.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:51

Um it is fantastic. It's a great dating app. It's really, really fantastic. So if you're ever someone I work with, like we were trying to figure out who this guy was that she like that lives in her building that she has like small feelings for. And we found everything on LinkedIn. I'm telling you. Like you can make you can make decide whether or not you should pursue it.

SPEAKER_08 1:11:16

Exactly. You can make very informed decisions by looking at someone's LinkedIn. Like, great dating app.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:22

Um fantastic.

SPEAKER_08 1:11:25

Anyway, now we've come to the end of this podcast episode.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:28

Oh, I'm sad.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:30

I'm sad.

SPEAKER_08 1:11:31

It was actually really fun.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:34

It was so lovely. Gosh, I love this. I love this. I love this for us.

SPEAKER_08 1:11:39

And we will soon be reunited. I'm so excited.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:44

Woo! Oh, those episodes are gonna be so funny. Those episodes are gonna be so funny.

SPEAKER_08 1:11:49

I'm wishing us love. I'm wishing us love and light.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:53

Um so by the time we're reunited, it will be the 10th episode, which would be great.

SPEAKER_08 1:11:57

Oh yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:59

Maybe we can have a guest for the 10th.

SPEAKER_08 1:12:01

We should. Okay, okay, guys. Anyway, thank you guys for listening. If you guys have done NYSC, we would love to hear about your experiences. Yeah, if you're not like Ayoandi who was a bruji kopper, please tell us about your experiences. Um, and also if you are an independent person, um, let us know. If you're an independent person, let us know um, you know, how people can best serve you, help you, what you do, you know. We want to know all. But you know, thank you guys for listening.

SPEAKER_07 1:12:38

And yeah, I kind of want people to start talking to us. I don't know.

SPEAKER_08 1:12:42

We don't post on Instagram.

SPEAKER_07 1:12:46

Good night, thank you everybody.

SPEAKER_08 1:12:49

See you in episode nine. It's been fun.

SPEAKER_07 1:12:51

See you in episode nine.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:53

Okay, bye. Bye.