Our Thing Called Life

7. Try Jesus, He's Free!

• Our Thing Called Life • Season 1 • Episode 7

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This week’s episode is genuinely such a good one! We spent some time catching up on life before getting into relationships with parents, growing older and what it looks like to become your own person while still trying to give your parents grace especially when you’ve grown up in a culture that expects things to look a very specific way.

We also introduced a brand new segment: Oyinlola’s Corner™️, where this week’s victim was people paying Etsy witches to predict their future 😭

A very funny & very honest episode. We hope you enjoy it as much as we did! 

Follow us on Instagram: @otclpodcast

Email us at otclpodcast@gmail.com

Episodes drop every other Friday🫶🏾

SPEAKER_06

So for that kind of woman to now come and be asking me, have you ever had sex before? I turned around.

SPEAKER_02

I looked at her dead in the eye. I said, Hell no.

SPEAKER_05

I have one Uber driver that drove me around in Lagos that is still messaging me today. Unbelievable to me.

SPEAKER_07

I'm so sorry. Let me call you mama.

SPEAKER_05

How can you, in your trying to be romantic, start messaging me good morning, Ulurina?

SPEAKER_08

Blocked.

SPEAKER_05

Immediately blocked.

SPEAKER_03

Hi, friends. Hi, family. Hi Winola. I'm Ayoandee. Your favorite cousin. Navigating this thing called life. And welcome to our thing called life. Enjoy. Hello.

SPEAKER_06

Hi everyone. Welcome back. Guys, I actually realized that Winala usually has like a very sexy hello and me. I knew you were gonna say this. I just sound like some agri on this podcast. And whoever edited that last podcast then else took the pass where I was saying nonsense. Took that pass and put it at the front of the podcast. I think you clearly hate me. Definitely you hate me. Guys, I can be sexy and cute too. Don't worry. I can give you a little bit of a hi guys.

SPEAKER_03

Hi everyone. Hello.

SPEAKER_05

What's really funny is it's not my intention to be sexy or sultry or whatever. It's just how I am. What can I say?

SPEAKER_01

Okay, darling.

SPEAKER_05

What can I say?

SPEAKER_06

Darling, it's okay. Don't worry. You can Do you know?

SPEAKER_05

Do you know what's really funny since we're even on this topic? I was coming home on Friday night.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

And I went to go do my hair on Friday. I just went to go wash it, whatever. And so I guess my hair was done. And um, my Uber driver was had picked me up, was bringing me home, and he goes, Oh, are you off to a man's house because your hair is done? I go, Sorry? Excuse me. Like, how is that the first thing you're asking me? That, oh, are you off to a man's house? I was like, No. But also, I don't like Uber drivers. Like, I don't like if I'm going home and it's late, I don't like Uber drivers knowing that I'm going to my house. So I always lie. Okay. Always lying.

SPEAKER_06

Okay, fair enough. So where did you tell me?

SPEAKER_05

I'm gonna lie. I said, yeah, I was going to a man's house. He was like, oh, are you going to a man's house because your hair is done and your hair looks nice?

SPEAKER_02

And I was just a bit like see your hair looks nice.

SPEAKER_05

Hair is cute. Just say your hair looks nice. And I would have been like, oh, thanks. No need for the are you going to a man's house? So I obviously was like, yeah, I'm going to my boyfriend's house. He was like, oh, how long have you guys been together? I said five years. Yeah. See, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

The thing about me is I'm like super aggressive with the like settings on Uber. So you know when it's like, what's your preference? I am super aggressive on the like quiet. Like I take that thing so seriously. So like if I'm in an Uber and I have selected choirs and you dare try to engage me, I will remind you. Hello, my preferences have been selected.

SPEAKER_01

If you care to look in the settings, I have pre-selected choirs. So yeah, let's not do that.

SPEAKER_05

Oh my goodness. I keep I keep having like interesting interactions with Uber drivers, like in Lagos, in London, like all joint. I just feel like I think the problem is I'm too friendly. So when I enter the car, I'm I'm always on it. Hey, how are you?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05

You know, like how's your day been? And it causes like a lot of challenges. Like I have one Uber driver that drove me around in Lagos that is still messaging me to me unbeknownst to me.

SPEAKER_07

I'm so sorry.

SPEAKER_05

No, actually, there's there's two of them. One of them, he one of them put on disappearing messages and I don't open his messages, so I can't see it. It just tells me that disappearing messages are on. The other one calls me Ui and I hate disagreements.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that's such yeah.

SPEAKER_05

I like if you know me, you know that I hate being called Owen. Like my name is Owen Lola. Like if you don't call me oinola, just don't call me at all.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_05

Um and it's just very and every time I don't respond, you'll be like, ah, oui, no response from you today. No response from me ever. Like I'm I'm never going to respond to you.

SPEAKER_06

Speaking of random, random, like I randomly got a message in my archives. And you know when you put in like messages in your archives, you like I don't expect to see a notification there. Like it's whatever. I've muted it. Yeah, never. So I just see like notification pop up in my archive. I'm like, what's going on? I click on it and it's like a plus two three four number from some random, random guy that I randomly met at some r like if I tell you where I met this person, you will actually scream because it was that night, that stupid night when I was 18 or 19 years old. Do you remember that whole situation? I've spoken about it on the podcast before. Where we're at Vapors or was it? Yeah, that random man sends me a voice note. Yeah, sends me a voice note saying, like, oh my gosh, I was just in like Yabba, and like I just remembered like that's how you know that this person is mad.

SPEAKER_02

That's a throwback. That's a throwback. He was like, I was just in Yabba.

SPEAKER_06

First of all, he says, Hey Wande, and I hate that as well. Who is Wande?

SPEAKER_01

Yuck.

SPEAKER_06

And he's like, I was just in Yabba, like drove past your estate, da-da-da. Like, just wanted to check up on you and see how you're doing. And I'm just like, guy, do you know how much has happened in my life? Like, since since I met you and stopped talking to you, people are so scary. People are so scary. Also, were you guys ever like talking?

SPEAKER_05

You guys had an interaction.

SPEAKER_06

Interaction, and I I felt I figured out like every two years he sends a message. I'm just like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_05

Sorry, but like, do you know how like I'm so sorry, and no shade, or maybe all the shade, whatever. But like, do you know how like either lonely or insanely desperate you need to be wow to be messaging someone that you had a a dalliance with on a night?

SPEAKER_06

The word that like I don't even want to be. I swear, I wish I was one of those people. I would play this voice notes for you guys on this podcast.

SPEAKER_05

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_06

But I will not do that, I will not embarrass somebody.

SPEAKER_05

But but you can you can forward it to me so I can listen to it.

SPEAKER_06

I was just like, what the hell? People are so so when you said that whole thing about the Uber driver hitting you up, I'm like, I'm not surprised because some of the guys they take persistence to a whole different level.

SPEAKER_05

Oh my god. And the fact that you brought this up just reminded me of a conversation that I was having with someone, I think like last week or two weeks ago. Yeah. And he was basically just like, he he is not a persistent guy. He was just saying that he's not persistent, that like if he shows interest in someone and um like maybe they don't, they're not feeling him, he'll just be like, oh, okay, whatever. Yeah, like and he will move on. And I was like, I find that to be really fascinating because I think most guys are quite persistent. Um and then he was like, nah, not really. And then he also goes, he doesn't understand why babes like persistence. And I was like, for some people, they just like like being chased. Like some people just like that there's somebody that is on their matter. Yeah, like yeah, even if they don't like them, they actually just like the idea that there is somebody that wants me so bad. Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_01

For sure.

SPEAKER_05

But I don't want them. So it makes you it makes you feel better about yourself, consciously. Because you're just like, oh, I'm a babe. Yeah. But then for other people, like I I do think that you can be convinced into liking someone if they are so persistent. I'm and I'm and let me I do not think that it will end well, speaking from experience.

SPEAKER_02

Yes, I was gonna say however I was gonna say you would know about that.

SPEAKER_05

Whoa. Anyway, I do think though, that people could be convinced. Like, I I'm I'm into persistence, obviously from the right person. Yeah, like this Uber driver now that is persistence, it's it's he's wasting his own time. This is not making me feel any better about myself because I'm just like, don't talk to me. However, like, yeah, I do think that there is something nice about persistence if it's from a person that you want to be pursuing you, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, but yeah. Have you ever like have you ever been in a situation where you've uh wanted someone more than like they've wanted you? Like, I mean, oh do you know anybody that has been in that situation? Because I mean it's always cute and nice when it's the other way around. Like, okay, especially if it's a guy that like maybe you're semi-interested in, but you're not like fully interested in, and then you know he goes for the chase or whatever. But then if it's the other way around, how do people handle that? I don't like I don't know if what I'm saying is making any sense. Um like I'm just trying I'm actually trying to to think of examples if I've had that happen.

SPEAKER_05

I don't think I've I don't think I've had it happen maybe in the way you're describing it. I've definitely had like I've definitely had like crushes on people that it was it was definitely like a one-sided crush. You know what I mean? But you're not gonna be a good thing. But like I I didn't do anything about the crush.

SPEAKER_03

Exactly.

SPEAKER_06

That's the difference. You're not waking up in the morning being like, hi, good morning, you know, Zaddy. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no. You're not.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, Zaddy. Oh my gosh, sorry. Just this good morning that you said to me just reminded me of someone that used to message a friend or a cousin of ours. Uh, good morning, Lorena.

SPEAKER_06

Please can you translate for the non-Yoruba um speakers?

SPEAKER_05

For the non-Yoruba listeners, um, that means it means it means good morning, big head. Well, it's not the same. It doesn't hit the same. It doesn't hit the same in Europe. One. No, it doesn't. Two, I don't know you. I also don't know you, bro. Like, no, I don't know you. Let's not do that. How can you? I maybe maybe I met you a week ago. Yeah. How can you, in your trying to be romantic, start messaging me, good morning, Ulurina blocks? Immediately blocks.

SPEAKER_06

Oh my goodness. No, let's not do that.

SPEAKER_05

Immediately blocked.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. But I don't know. I think the difference is just like you would not be doing any like you would have the crush and maybe one of you. Like, because I've actually had that. I'm just remembering now. Like maybe the person would message you and you know you get excited and maybe you message back. But I am not double texting. I am not following up. I am not sending you that message. I am waiting. Like I am sat patiently waiting. Yeah. Because it just feels so icky to say, I don't, yes, real.

SPEAKER_05

And that's and that's the cook. I don't double text. Um, it's just not something I'm into. Like, if you don't respond, in my mind, I'm assuming that like you're busy, you haven't seen it, or you just hate me. Yeah. And that's okay. Yeah. Yeah. Like, and if you if you hate me, I'm okay with that. I I'm a big girl, you know, I'll get over it. Um but like to double text a man, like the thought of it Oh my gosh. Literally, it sends chills down my spine. Um there was sorry. But like I I don't know. Men double text all the time. They do. But anyway, continue.

SPEAKER_06

They're BBMDs, guys. So this is very old. There was one of somebody I was talking to, and again, similar. I was like, you know, feeling the whole situation. Um, maybe I sent like a meme or something, and then the person didn't reply, and then oh no, they replied, and then I sent a message and then they didn't reply, but and that was you know, I then sent the same message again, but like obviously the double text. And the person was like, Did you didn't you just send that message? And I was just like, Yeah, like take the ground should take me up. Take me, please. Just like take me, please. Never again. Never that was the DM. I said thank you very much. Thank you.

SPEAKER_05

Okay, my question to you is let's just go back into young guy Ayoandy's mind. What were you thinking? What why did you send the same message twice?

SPEAKER_01

I have no idea.

SPEAKER_06

I have I try like I I I have no flipping clue. Maybe I thought it didn't. You didn't even think, oh, let me spice it up. I copied it and pasted it the exact same message. I know I did. I am so shy. Guys, so no, but I needed it. It's part of my growth. It was part of my growth.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, you know what? Everything, everything, having is part of your it does. Yeah, it does. It does. Oh god, that's just reminded me of something really embarrassing. Anyway, how are you?

SPEAKER_03

I am the last two weeks. Oh, it's been two weeks. Wow. It's been two weeks. Look at us.

SPEAKER_06

What is this now, episode seven? Look at us. Look at that, guys.

SPEAKER_05

Sure. Consistency.

SPEAKER_06

Consistency. Your girls are bad. What do I call that? I told you that that blip was just a blip. I told you it's not gonna happen again.

SPEAKER_05

It was just a blip.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, we are so bad. It was just a blip. Um, I was listening to the last week's the was it last week or two weeks ago episode. Um, first of all, just dying and reminding myself of the pain of recording that episode. Just like how crazy that whole thing was. My favorite part of the episode was when you were like, oh, I have a rant. And I was just like, oh my god, I cannot believe I have to hear this again. I quite enjoyed that episode, and it seemed like you guys did as well. Um, but I have been I've been good. What's been happening? Just just work, to be honest. I think work and rest. That is so boring. It's so boring. I don't think oh well, work and rest and obviously party. Like I will party, I will enjoy myself. I was You were partying last week. I was at group therapy, I was on the floor, not on the actual floor, but the actual dance floor. Um, and I was living my best aunt life because I do love me somehow for a house. Um, to be very honest with you guys, I can actually go for a lot of these things by myself. I just put on some sunglasses and I'm fine. I sometimes feel like constrained when I'm with people who are like, oh my god, can we go? Can we go? But this group that we went with was a solid group. Like everyone was on just really good. Who did you go with? I went with a bunch of people. So I went with Ariet and her friend, and I also went with my man's, and then I went with um Chelsea and like a bunch of other people as well. So it was just like I went with my mans and then kind of like merged with other people, and yeah, it was just a really fun bunch and group. Um sorry, can I pause you there for a quick second?

SPEAKER_05

Can I ask you a really random question? What if I say though? Yeah, I'm still gonna ask you anyway. In yeah, in conversation with people, do you say my boyfriend? No. My boyfriend. If you're talking about if you're talking about your boyfriend, if you're talking to someone that doesn't know him, right? So if you say his name, people they they won't know. Yeah. Do you just be like, oh, and then my boyfriend? Is that part of your vocal?

SPEAKER_06

So how do you refer to him? My man's like, or my MCM, as you guys know, like, oh yeah, my MCM, and then people be like, Who do you mean your MCM? And I'll be like, oh yeah, my whatever. We both don't use the term.

SPEAKER_05

Like, we're both just like Yeah, so there's something, there's something really terrifying about referring to someone as my boyfriend.

SPEAKER_06

Like, you know, it feels like it makes me sick. It's like you feel you feel it feels as if like you're like a kept woman, and it's just like, you know, you know how like married people are like, yeah, my husband this, my husband, my wife this, like no, like my MCM, my man's that's it.

SPEAKER_05

And then also, I was I was with Laulu on Friday, and I said to her, like, I asked her, like, are you going to now start referring to your fiance when you guys get married as your husband? Yeah. And I was just like, that is really crazy. That's crazy. Because I watched a video of one girl, this girl is young, and she was referring to her husband as her hubby. And I just thought, hubby, I feel like hubby one is what, like, is that what the 60 plus women say. Yeah. Oh my hubby. But then also hubby as like a nickname makes me feel sick.

SPEAKER_06

No. I think it genuinely. Yeah. I would just do I'm trying like my manager in my office, he talks. I mean, sometimes he talks about his wife, but I like what your friend does when your friend says my roommate. I actually really like that. Just like my roommate. And you guys will get just like who I'm talking about. You understand? Oh, yeah. But like city. I think people really like referring to themselves as like my boyfriend, my girlfriend, my husband, my wife. I think some people really, really like it. Like they take pleasure from it. Do you know what I mean? Because they're like, oh my god, I'm carrying.

SPEAKER_05

My wife sounds my wife sounds nicer than my husband. Does that make sense? Yeah. Like I would, I would, this is this is about to sound so insane. I'm so okay with my partner referring to me as their girlfriend or their wife. Okay. I'm not okay with referring to him as my boyfriend. Okay. I'm not okay with it. I'm not okay with that.

SPEAKER_06

You need to unpack that for yourself. Okay. It's giving some trauma.

SPEAKER_05

I feel like if I would ever if I would ever talk to anyone about like my partner, I would either just say his name.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I think it's best I should just say his name. Like, okay, like to say drr my boyfriend. Obviously, you know, the pod world don't know the person's name, so I'm just gonna be like my man's or my MCM. I really just like saying my MCM because I love saying my MCM. My MCM, my MCM. Everyone gets the gist, you know what I mean? And it's not so like possessive, you know what I mean? Yeah, but yeah, I had a good had a good dance, had a good party. Um, and yeah, just nice. Just just that's that's it, really. Lagos life is just Lagos thing. How about you? How is the Ukes?

SPEAKER_05

How's the Ukes? It's so boring, it's actually so boring. And that's that's the worst part. It's that the weather, I don't even know what's gone on with the weather, but it's been so cold. Yeah, look at this babe from the uks talking about the weather.

SPEAKER_06

Of course, you guys are so boring.

SPEAKER_05

Like, I'm so predictable. Like, so predictable. Um, but I've been okay. Um, what have I done recently? Absolutely nothing. I went to the final taping of SNL yesterday. Was it good? Um, so that was fun.

SPEAKER_06

Is that on Skype?

SPEAKER_05

It was good. Uh uh. It's on channel four.

SPEAKER_06

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what kind of stupid question that is. I don't know.

SPEAKER_05

Um yes, it's on Sky. Yeah. Um it was good. Um that was it, was it was a good host.

SPEAKER_06

Are the laughs like actually real?

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're not they're not fake. It's people laughing in the audience. Okay, okay, okay.

SPEAKER_06

Like and people actually laugh. Like they're not told, like, okay, can you guys make sure you laugh, laugh?

SPEAKER_05

No, that they're not told that they're not told to laugh.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, okay, good, good.

SPEAKER_05

Um because like in I think yesterday's episode was maybe the first time that I realized that like they're not told to laugh because there were some parts where they weren't laughing, but it was meant to be funny. Awkward. Yeah. So yeah. So, you know, um, really good. I'm very proud of like, obviously, I didn't really work on it, but I'm just I think it's it's a massive production. Yeah. And I'm very proud of like everyone that worked on it. And even just like the cast, and I think it's probably going to change all of their lives forever, and that's just really cool. Of course. Um, and yeah, I went to that, went to the after party, got kind of drunk. Fun. Um fun.

SPEAKER_06

It's a good time. That sounds like a good time. It's a good time. Yeah, love it here. That was nice. I feel like something was meant to happen. Like I was meant to say my how my week was lost, right? Oh, yeah, you were. You were actually. But you know, we are here just vibing and vibing and vibing. Um I'm out here in Miami. There were a couple of things I wanted to mention. Here we go. Okay. First of all, I yeah, guys, you you should already know by now. First of all, the roost of Kevin Hart's um didn't watch it. You didn't like you chose not to watch it, or you're just like not interested, or you just haven't gone into watching it. Like, what is it?

SPEAKER_05

I haven't had I haven't had the time to watch it. I've seen clips, um, and I just I'm not I'm not moved. Nothing is moving me to watch it. Do you get what I mean?

SPEAKER_06

Like, yeah. So I watched that. So as I watch it, I haven't finished it yet. I don't think I'm gonna finish, but like as I've got the gist. Um and I just think that we don't need to there's something about like the way they like do shows where especially roosts where they try and bring in all these like celebs who aren't really funny and then they just like get them to read the script and it's just not funny and it's very uncomfortable, and then I'm thinking like the audience are they having to like fake their laughs? And I felt that way. I couldn't watch Tiana Taylor's like bit.

SPEAKER_05

I saw I saw the clip of that.

SPEAKER_06

I couldn't watch Lizo's bit as well. Um, there was another I could not watch um what's that foot footballer guy called the All-Star, whatever his name is. They didn't know how many footballers exist in the world. They did a roast on him. Oh, Tom Brady. I could not watch Tom Brady's. It was just but I would say some of the other actual like comics were really, really, really, really funny. Like Kat Williams delivered fantastic that was genuine. I laughed a lot. Um, the guy who hosted Shane Gillis, no idea who that guy was. He kind of sounds like the guy of a family guy, no idea. But he killed, he helped. Um, and there was another person, I think it's like Cheryl Underwood, um, who was also just really, really funny. And like, yeah, so I think what I was just gonna say is like that's the first roast I've ever watched that I actually enjoyed like parts of it. Enjoyed knowing what to skip, you should know what to skip, don't like watch everything. Um, and I would actually recommend people to like watch it. It's it's funny. And also, you kind of have to understand like the certain the humour and like understand Kevin Hart's lore. Like, if you don't, it's not it's not gonna make sense. I think you do, it's not gonna make sense. Similarly, with like there was a lot of banter between the comics themselves, and if you just don't know why there's this banter, like you're not gonna laugh, but yeah, anyway. So that's the first thing I was gonna say. And then the second thing is like I had a bit of a like uh thing with my parents this this week. Um, and not a big deal. Major aside before I go into that, I recently found out that one of my aunties actually listens to this podcast. So shout out to you, Auntie. You know yourself. Um, thank you for listening. Which auntie is that? Um, Tony's mommy. Tony's mommy, Auntie Bones. She listens to the pod. Yeah, I don't know how I feel that she listens to the pod, but like she listens, it's okay.

SPEAKER_01

And it kind of like That's crazy to me.

SPEAKER_06

It's a really good um segue into the topic I want to bring up. But basically, I had a thing with my parents. Um, I was on the call, and then like my my dad was talking to me about something, and I think I was just trying to say something, and then next thing I know, like my mom is just shouting in the background. And I was just like, I was already not in a good mood, right? Before I picked up this call, like I had been annoyed by some idiot hairdresser that I don't even want to talk about, and then I'm like having to manage on this call talking to like my dad, blah blah blah, and then next thing I know, my mother is shouting. Why are you shouting on the call? And I think it was because she told me, like, I told her the person who cleans the house, like she's sick, and she can't come to clean the house this week. Um, and my dad was like, Oh, it's fine, you know, don't worry, like when he gets back home, he'll clean. Mommy's like, how can you not clean the house? You you're just sitting at home, you're not doing anything, you're clean. And I was telling her, like, ma'am, I have had a week. Like, I cannot clean. Like the thought of picking up broom and backer, I'm picking up more pain. I can't think about this. I cannot find them. And I also had this pack of laundry, a pile of laundry that I needed to sort out. I'm like, ma'am. I think she first asked me, like, why can't you clean the house? I was like, No, I can't. And she was like, What do you mean? No, you can't. I was like, I actually don't have the bandwidth to clean the house. And she was just like, Can you imagine? You can't imagine this. And I was like, Oh, by the way, I'm just I was like, Oh, oh guys, I'm not in a good mood. Like, I'm gonna go. They were like, What do you mean you're going to go? I'm like, guys, I'm so sorry, I'm not in a good mood. I can't deal with this conversation. I'll talk to you later. And I caught the phone on them. Ha ha. Oh my god. Yeah. That didn't go down very well, clearly. But obviously, no. This segue segues me into the topic that I wanted to bring up about parents, right? And about like, you know, we grow up in an a culture where it's important to like respect your parents, obviously, regardless, you know, they've done a lot for you and things like that. But you know, sometimes our culture might take it a bit too extreme, where you can't really be honest with your parents, or you can't necessarily tell them whether what or not what they've done is like right or wrong, or you can't talk to them candidly about how you're feeling, or maybe you're not in a good mood, and so you're not necessarily able to do this, or kind of just showing them that I am you're growing up, you've grown up as well. You're an adult. There's still that respect being as you're growing up, as you're like becoming and your personality is evolving, like actually being able to talk to your parents as like adults, right? And I feel like in our culture, a lot of people are so scared to do that and are so like worried of their parents like knowing who they are, knowing who they're becoming. Um, and it reminded me of this video of this girl that she posted. I think um her name is Yvonne. She posted it on TikTok, and she was basically on the phone. Um, she was filming herself doing a get ready with me. Um, and then I think her boyfriend came and said, like, oh, your dad, um her fiance actually came in, like, yeah, your dad called and I told him that you were getting ready.

SPEAKER_00

And she was like, You told him I was getting ready. He's gonna know that we're in the same place. He's gonna know we're in the same house.

SPEAKER_06

And yeah, I mean, it's just I would love to like get your thoughts on this and understand, unpack this topic a little bit, but like, why is it so difficult to show your parents, especially Nigerian, maybe African parents, like who you really are, and being like honest and vulnerable about the things that you're going through with them, um, and why are like so many people like so shy to do that? And how have you been able to do that with your own relationship with your parents?

SPEAKER_05

Ah ha ha ha ha lol. How have I been able to do that? I have not. Um, which is so interesting to me because just last week, or maybe two weeks ago, no, it was two weeks ago, um, a very similar situation happened to me, and my home is actually in this house. So um I was going out. It was a Friday, I was going out, I was going to do my hair, but I was rushing out of the house. Yeah. So I rushed out of the house. I was also going to my friend's house. Um, so I was rushing out of the house, ran into the Uber on the way. In the Uber, I get a phone call, pick up the phone, hello, da-da-da. It's my mom. I was like, hello. She's yelling at me on the phone, like screeching. And she she's basically just like, you're so rude. Like, I'm trying, I'm lowering my voice because she's in this house. Um she's like, she was like, You are so rude. Now, how have you developed this attitude that she was going off on me? Right. And then she cuts the phone. So I don't even have an opportunity to defend myself. Yes. Now, you might you may be wondering why she's all that's the next question. She said, I I she said I left the house without telling her I was going up. I want you guys to know that I'm 30. I'm going to be 31 in August. Oh my God. And I was like, I was actually like, when when did that start? And I was so irate. Right? Like, I remember the only feeling that I had was anger. I was so angry because I was like, I have done absolutely nothing to deserve this level of, I don't want to use the word vitriol, but that's really what it felt like. Because I was like, I was like, what did I do? I left the house. And I was like, I was literally about to message you guys in the family group chats to be like, I've left the house. I was like, I was like, I just left the house. You didn't even let me do that. Um, and so what I did was I sent her a really long message about how I felt about it. Nice. And I was just like, and ordinarily, I wouldn't do that. Yeah. Like normally I would stew in my anger, she was stewing her anger, yeah, and we just won't speak to each other for ages. And then one day we'll just start talking, we'll just start talking to each other again. Um, but that day, the I was just like, no, like we can't continue to exist in a space where the only person who is allowed to um share their feelings is you. I don't like that. That that doesn't work for me.

SPEAKER_01

I love what you just said.

SPEAKER_05

As much as you are as much as you are angry, so am I. Like, I'm also going through things. I'm also like, I've I'm I may have also been having a terrible day. Like the fact that you didn't even give me the benefit of the doubt as to why I was doing this, and you just immediately started calling me names, I was like, how did we get here? And do you know what's so funny? I watched a video, I think it was Banke that sent it to me on Instagram, and it was this woman with her three children, and I think she I don't I I can't remember. I don't want to say that this is what she is, but I think she's like a development coach or something. Um, if I can find the link, I'll put it in like the show show notes. And she basically asked her children, like, what is one thing that I did to you when you were younger that has like stayed with you? And one of the daughters basically said that she it was like her 10th birthday or so, and she um remembered that like she was wearing an outfit and her pants line was showing. And instead of her mom to just tell her that your pant line is showing, her mom beat her. And she said that that memory has like stayed with her. And I um her mom then now said that oh, that when she when the children were younger, or that not even that when they were younger, but that she struggled with really bad like anger issues and just like really bad temperaments, and she used to take that out on the kids, clearly. Um, and I was just like, whoa, wow. The fact that you can one admit that is crazy to me because I think that if they would if they would take the time to actually examine their feelings, they would realize that they actually don't know how to regulate their emotions. And um and and so in the not knowing how to like regulate the emotion that they're feeling, it just turns to anger. Because I'm like, if we were to actually just if you had just said to me calmly, like, I don't like that you did XYZ, I would have explained this is what happened and would have been able to resolve it amicably. But I also think that our culture, like you said, doesn't breed an environment where you're even allowed to express your feelings or you're allowed to talk back. So from young, you have always been, you've always felt like you're not even allowed to speak, which is why it continues, in my opinion, continues to give them the leeway to speak to you the way that they do because you haven't said anything. You haven't said, like, oh, don't talk to me like that. You see, my sister now, there is my sister, my sister is 10 years younger than me, right? She could she can probably hear me. My sister doesn't take rubbish. And I wish that when I was her age, I did the same. If you yell at her, she's gonna yell back. She's gonna give it to you back. You're not just gonna like say your own and then no, no, no. She will also say her own. Let us let us get it. Everything has to be on the table. If everybody is angry, let everybody be angry. But I also think that that comes with like one, these Gen Z kids just don't care. And then two, I also think that our parents are older. So they don't have the strength to fight as much.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

So when I was 21, they had the strength to fight me. But they don't have the strength to fight my sister. Because also, my sister has shown, and I I think I I've said this on this podcast, my sister has shown everybody who she is. If she doesn't want to do something, she's not going to do it. You can't like, you can't bend, you can't force her, you can't um guilt trip her. If she doesn't want to do it, she's not gonna do it. And so I think when you have shown someone who you are, they have to take you at that. Whereas me, oh, you just you just beg me, oh wait, please now, oh you know, oh, oh, da. Even if it's a massive inconvenience to my day, yeah, even if it's something that I did not intend to do, something I that will take, like I have this entire day planned to eat. Yeah. Let a good example every time is when I'm in Lagos. I've planned my day, I know exactly what I'm doing. Then you come from left field. Ah, can you can can I take your driver to Suruleri? No, you can't. You can't, actually, because I'm going out. And so, and then it's now like a oh, but then how will I get there? I don't know. And then it becomes, and then I start to feel bad because then I'm like, oh, but truly, how will she get there? How she did if it was my sister, my sister would be like, yeah, no, that's it. Yeah. And so I just I would love, and I don't know if they would ever feel comfortable enough, but I would love, even if it's not our mothers, but I would love to have a conversation with mothers in general, just about like just that that feeling. Because I know that it's something that I still struggle with. And there's it's also like difficult. Like, I like I love my mom down. Yeah, of course. Me and her, yeah, like we go together real bad. Like, that's that's my serious gist partner. Um, and sometimes I'm like, you know, that's my friend. I want to tell her about things, but then also I'm like, I know exactly how you're going to react if I tell you something. And I don't I don't I don't need that reaction.

SPEAKER_06

Let me tell you guys one funny story like this. So there was one time, and like again, me and my mom were cool, where you know, where our relationship is evolving and stuff, and we're like as I'm getting older, we're getting closer. Anyway, there was one time before, I think I must have been like 21 or something, and then we had like guests over, so I was saying sharing the same room as my mom or something like that. And I think I'd like gotten ready, I was like sitting down, chilling. She was also like getting ready. I don't know what we're doing, Shah. Maybe I was just chilling. She was now like I don't even know what this in London, by the way. I don't know what the hell I don't know what the hell mood she was in, or what the hell feeling. I know what this question is. This woman had gone to watch and listen, or what Jesus my mother had entered that weekend, but somebody must have planted her with that idea to say, why don't you just get your kids in a vulnerable position or like get them comfortable and start to discuss certain things with them? I think at that time, uh maybe I was like a year into my first ever relationship. So I was like between two. My mother was now like, I want to ask you something. I said, okay. I said, Oh yeah, no problem. She won't close the door, something like that. She was sitting and laying a trap.

SPEAKER_00

She goes, I've never sorry, I actually can't, I literally can't. She goes, Have you ever had sex before?

SPEAKER_06

You know when you're just gobsmarks, like first of all, guys, I want you to understand the kind of model I have. Like, we are not talking about these kind of things. There's no birds, the only birds and the beast conversation we're having is don't do it, do not. Do you understand? That is there's no room for oh, you even she don't want to know, don't do it. So for that kind of woman to now come and be asking me, Have you ever had sex before?

SPEAKER_02

I turned around, I looked her dead in the eye. I said, Hell no.

SPEAKER_06

I said, Hell no, no. I said, how can you even ask me such a question? What I can't believe you are asking me such no. And my mother's response, bless her heart. She said, Okay, that's good, that's good, that's good.

SPEAKER_03

I just wanted to know. That's good. It's very good. Keep it that way, don't worry.

SPEAKER_05

Do you know? Do you know what's really funny? And this is so bad. I was in the hospital in November last year. And um, it was, I was, it was really, it was really crazy, um, crazy experience. And um when I got there, um the first doctor who came to come and see me, the first like gynecologist, it was something, anyway, it doesn't matter. The first doctor who came to come and see me asked my parents to step out of the room, obviously. So asking all these questions, da-da-da, I answered. The second doctor, I had to do this like scan, da-da-da. So when she came back to come and like tell me the results of the scan, she started asking me all these questions. Have when was the last time you had sex in front of my parents? Are you sexually active in front of my parents? So I was like, no. She said, Have you ever I said no? What and I could see, I could see, like she was puzzled. Like, um, so how were you able, like the the this the exam that I did, she was like, so how were you able to do that exam with like no pain? I said, no. I don't even what are you talking about? And first of all, I was not looking at her like you didn't even ask my parents to leave the room. Like you're asking me all these intimate questions. And I could see, like, on I could see on my mom's face that she was like smirking. I think I think maybe she was just like good. Very good. My good and wonderful child.

SPEAKER_02

Good girl. Ah, my good, good girl.

SPEAKER_05

Dude, I don't, I don't, I don't think it's and I obviously it's Funny, like we're laughing, and there's a high chance that they're never going to listen to this. Or maybe they will. I don't know. I don't care. I when I me either, but when I think about like I don't think I like I don't love that I can't there's certain things that I just can't talk to them about. Yeah. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I know. And I think the whole reason I brought this up was just like for me, I'm trying to gain more confidence in just being like show them like this is you. Do you understand? This is who I am.

SPEAKER_05

Sorry, before you continue, I I really think that you do do a good job of that. Like genuinely. Maybe you don't feel that way. But I think because sometimes I look at you and I'm just like, if I could just have a modicum, just a modicum of the audacity that Ayawand has, then I think things would be so different. Because like you you are very, you are very, very, very good at setting boundaries. And I think that like obviously they can be shifted and bended and molded. Yes. And your sometimes your parents don't like respect the boundaries that you that you set. But I do think that you do a good job of setting it. And I I also think that your parents have a very good idea of the kind of person that you are. Yeah, I think so.

SPEAKER_06

I think so.

SPEAKER_05

And I I think parents being parents choose to ignore. But I do think that you have actually made it very clear.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

That either I'm like, I can't be available, I can't, and I also think that you communicate really well. Like if you can't do it, you will say, I cannot do this on this day, but I can do it on this day. Whereas I am not like that. And I think it's because they think Yeah, because they think that they can manipulate me easily. And they can't even that they think that they can.

SPEAKER_06

It is a firstborn child thing. It's 100%. You need to remember, I'm second. 100% right at the end of the day. Because I've had many situations where like if I can't do something, they know that they're going to go and ask Ayo. And like he's not, he will he will bend over backwards and figure it out.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Because I don't know if it's like you guys have a fear of like, oh, you guys have this sense of responsibility, or you have this fear of disappointing them, or whatever it is. And sometimes I'm always so shocked. I'm like, you he will go through hoops to get this thing done for them. And I'm just like, well, thank you. I'm glad I'm not the firstborn. But I also do think, and I like I would love to understand from your perspective, like, firstborns, like they actually need to do more to really set those boundaries. Like, you can't always be flexible and be bending and be this and that. And again, like I would give and my brother some credit in that. Like, he broke a lot, like, he did a lot of crazy that like allowed me to just be like, you know what? Like, I've seen the limits of these people, and I know that they're not they're not the kind of people that will like disown you or whatever it is. So, like, I know how to kind of work within what they can tolerate and stuff. So it's important to like have that kind of sibling that has like pushed the boundary for the family, but I think sometimes it's just difficult as a firstborn to be able to just like set doors.

SPEAKER_05

It is very difficult. It's it's very difficult being the firstborn, and obviously I can only then speak from being the firstborn girl. Yeah. And there's also just again, with the way that our culture expects women to behave and all of those kind of things, there's so much pressure on doing the right thing. And I just I I hate how much emphasis is put on the right thing, because there's no such thing as the right thing. Obviously, like there are certain moral choices where there are the right thing to do. But like, I remember for such a long time, like when I was growing up, I was such a pick me. Like I was such a pick me because you are taught to believe that like your existence genuinely is like it's for the pleasure of men. Like, oh, you have the way to it the way to a man's heart is um is through his stomach. Oh, you need to know how to cook because of that. Oh, you need to make sure that you you look you look good and you're dressed well so that people can see you and you look presentable and you do this and you do. So there's so much pressure where you don't even have like the time to kind of like explore like who am I outside of all of these um expectations that have been placed onto me. And then on top of that, I'm expected to be a good role model to my sister. I'm expected for my sister to look at me and be like, okay, I want to be like her, or I I need to, you know, follow the footsteps in that she's following. I'm expected to be a good and respectable daughter. I'm expected to be, you know, a responsible child. I'm expected to take all the country. Yeah. I'm I'm like I'm expected to do all these things. I have all my younger cousins that are looking up, that are looking up to me. So I don't want to, I don't want to um, you know, take any like wrong steps or like lead them astray because that's a thing. Yeah. Because also, again, in in in Nigerian communities, particularly in like Yoruba culture as well, like there's there's actually a saying, there's Yoruba saying where it's like it's not just one person that it takes to raise a child. Like just like it's a village, like it's a community. So like as much as my mom is my mom, Ayoande's mom is very much my mother too. Like, yep. So um, and so your mom, I want to say her name. Your mom can tell me off the same way that my mom would tell me off, and I wouldn't see anything wrong in that because that's just how I yeah, or like I rely on them for things, right?

SPEAKER_06

Oh, can you come and help us do this? Can you come and do this for me?

SPEAKER_05

Yes, exactly. So there's all this like pressure and expectation, and like I don't want to, I don't want to disappoint, I don't want them to be disappointed in me, I don't want them, I don't want to let them down, I don't want to do all these things. And that can be all consuming.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Like, and I would say that it's very, it's a very recent, bearing in mind that I'm 30 recent developments that I've even started to fight back. Yep. Because I'm like, I'm actually tired. I'm tired, it's a lot, and I'm also I am my own human being. I'm my own woman. Um, I'm trying to figure out the world just the same way that you are. And also I do love to like extend grace to my parents as well. In that, like, it's there's no handbook on being a parent. There's no handbook on growing older, like there's no handbook on all these things. And like, I know I spoke earlier about like emotional regulation and like, but like these are not things that they were talking about when they were younger. Like their parent, their parents were not talking about, oh, are you emotionally regulated? Are you emotionally mature? All these kind of things. Like, these are things that we are now discussing that that can hopefully make us better parents or better people. Yep. Um, but like, you know, it's their first time experiencing the world too. But like that, if I'm gonna take it back to that Instagram video that I mentioned, that woman put in the work to be a better parent because she noticed what it was doing not only to her but to her relationship with her children. Yep, and she didn't like that. And so I think that's also kind of where the like where the the sticking point is for me because I'm like yes, I'm extending grace, and I understand that you don't understand all these things, but you can also do the work to be better.

SPEAKER_06

Yes, exactly. You know, I like that. I love that I really like that was an interesting take that you had, to be honest, and I think it again it just varies, it really varies depending on where you are, your position. Like, you know, if you have two older siblings, like bruh, come on. There's there are more people that they can rely on than you. So you you can just be what you want to do, like act up, do what you want to do. Like, if you have an older brother, older sister, like please, like my existence, I'm just gonna be me and do whatever. Do you understand what I mean? Because like, and then you have these people who can help parents tell tell your parents how to parent you better, so you get to enjoy like the benefits. I'm just thinking of my younger brother here because I'm just like the amount of times I've had to go to my mom and tell her, like, you need to change your approach, you need to change your style working, you are gonna lose this child and this relationship. Yeah, and you know what? It takes a lot for a parent to like sit down and hear that from a child, and like I would give them a lot of kudos. I think our parents, like, yes, they have their faults and everything, but like we're actually lucky with the kind of people that we have as parents, so yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Hundred percent, hundred percent. And it's funny that we're actually only speaking about yeah. I was gonna say it's funny that we're only actually referring to our mothers in this convo. Um, because our dads are just chill.

SPEAKER_06

My papa. You know that when that whole thing happened, and I was like, I need to go, I'm low in a good mood. My dad then calls me like two hours later, he's like, I went to MS. I bought you some cloud chocolates, I bought all your favorite ones, and I just want to make sure you're okay. And I was like, Oh my god, did you remember which flavors did you buy? He's like, I bought pistachio, I bought the honeycomb. I said, Okay, thank you very much. He's like, Don't worry, you don't have to clean if you don't want to.

SPEAKER_08

He's like, you know what?

SPEAKER_06

I'm gonna clean for you. Thank you very much. He said, just talk to your mother. It's okay. They're very chill people, they are just very, yeah, very chill.

SPEAKER_05

My daddy's only used to give advice.

SPEAKER_02

Ah gosh, on a booster.

SPEAKER_05

One thing about him, he's gonna he's gonna reference one book he read, one article he saw. Just like golly.

SPEAKER_06

Oh god. Anyway, speaking of an idea.

SPEAKER_05

I was actually telling someone the other day.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Wait, sorry. I was actually telling someone the other day that I think my dad is like one of the most well-read people that I know.

SPEAKER_06

100%.

SPEAKER_05

Um and I love that. I think it's great, but like sometimes I'm just like, oh, I just came, I just came to cackle. I just I just I wanted to have a little chin wag. Never want to go back to my room.

SPEAKER_06

It's never gonna be that.

SPEAKER_05

Anyway, as you were, speaking of rants and advice.

SPEAKER_06

I was gonna say, don't you have a rant today? For we have rants special, you guys.

SPEAKER_08

It's gonna be Oinala's rants.

SPEAKER_06

Last episode was a preview of it. You're gonna get Oinala's rants every week, where she goes off a topic she's very passionate about. Um, so please go ahead and let us know.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah. I have a massive rant. The rant I was actually gonna do this week. Um, I'm actually gonna save it for the next episode because I think it can spur into a bigger conversation. Okay. But what I want to rant about today, as much as I amade doesn't want to hear this, I want to talk about the Etsy witches.

SPEAKER_02

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_05

Guys, I am sick. Okay, look, okay. I am sick and tired. I am sick and tired of seeing people make videos about paying a witch on Etsy money to predict their future. And I think the reason why it's aggravating to me is that these are the same people who don't believe that God is real, right? And so I'm struggling to compute how you can understand how you're willing to pay money to a witch, right? Who is going to use some sort of quote-unquote power to predict your future, right? But you don't believe that God is real. Meanwhile, God is free. God is free. God did not ask you for $5, God did not ask you for 10 pounds, God did not ask you for 15,000 naira. God did not ask you for a dime. And like, not to like make this like overly spiritual, but the Bible does talk about how like we're not wrestling against flesh and blood. Like, not all power is good power. So, like, yes, maybe this witch will tell you something that is happening in your future. That is very possible. Like, Juju is real. Like, there are there are principalities and and things that have power, but like you also need to be very careful about the sort of power that you are inviting into your life. Like, what but what like why do you feel so comfortable? Like, what what in your life is going so wrong that your next resort is I want to go and pay a witch that I don't know, I don't know, to come and tell me that everything is going to be okay. Yep. And I just think that like I'm I'm concerned that people are doing things because they see other people doing it. 100%. If you see one person going to a witch and paying a witch, whatever, that's their business. But like you now hop on that bandwagon and you decide to do it, and you don't know, like, you don't know what sort of like what's uh what's the word I'm looking for? What is in your lineage. Yes. And like again, not to make this like overly spiritual, but again, I believe in Jesus, I believe in the Holy Spirit. I've been to services where they are, you know, trying to pray things out of people, and the things that you see are really scary. And so, like, as much as this is erant, it's also just like a cautionary tale to people to just like be careful. Yeah, like if you don't want to try Jesus, that's okay. You don't have to. I'm encouraging you to try Jesus. For one, he's free. But you know, that's that's the first one. Um, Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. Okay. Like there's nothing that the witch can tell you. There's nothing that the witch can tell you that um is that is factual or that is based in truth if it's not based in the Holy Spirit. But also, just be careful. Do you know like just you need to be careful with the things that you're allowing into your spirit, yeah. Like, if even if it's not a witch, just like with certain things that you watch as well. Like, I used to be so obsessed with vampire diaries, but honestly, my spirit doesn't allow me to watch it anymore. And again, say whatever you want to say, but it just doesn't.

SPEAKER_06

But did you watch?

SPEAKER_05

I don't feel comfortable. No.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, okay. You're standing on Tentos. Okay. I didn't watch it. Because I was gonna side out you if you watch Sinners.

SPEAKER_05

I didn't watch Sinners. I couldn't actually bring myself to watch it. Yeah, I watched like the featurette, I watched the making of, I was rooting for all the people. Yeah, but I genuinely could not bring myself to watch it. And again, not I'm not I was not looking down on anybody that did. That's anybody's business.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

But like there are just certain things that my spirit just doesn't like anymore.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is fair.

SPEAKER_05

Like it just I I I I I don't like. You're not trying to invite anybody. And I just think that we all just no, but just in general, I think that you should just be very because even just like you could be having like I remember I was telling someone that I used to really love writing, and I still do love writing, and one time someone told me that my writing wasn't great, and it really affected like me, and it affected like how I saw writing and all this kind of stuff. And um that really affected me for a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very long time, right? And it's just like allowing the things that people say to you to affect you, right? Um, and just like the things that people are saying over you, like you just you just need to be very, very, very careful.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, um just be mindful of the things that plays like this whole thing kind of thing plays out called Um The Fisherman. Um, and it's interesting. It's like by a Nigerian author, um, and it's set in Nigeria, and it's about like these three brothers, and I think one of them again, I read it a long time ago, so I might not remember like properly, but I think one of them got like a premonition, is that the word? I don't know. Like they just got someone told them that oh, something like your brother is going to kill you, or your brother is going to do something bad to you, or something like that, and like they just started spiralling. That person just like started spiralling because of that, and basically like orchestrated this situation to happen that would have never happened had you not heard or like had you not internalized what that person had said or what this like madman had said to this guy on the road. Um, and I found it so so so so so interesting. Like when you just hear something from someone and you start to think that it's true, and you start like you could actually like end up making it into reality just because you are like overthinking this whole thing and like your actions are causing you to like instead of just behaving and living and existing as you were, you're like trying to avoid this thing, and then you end up actually meeting and colliding with this thing in the end. So, yeah, you're so right. Like what people say, take it with a pinch of salt.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, and then also my question to the people that are paying the Etsy witches is that like, so if the witch now tells you something you don't want to hear, how far? Like, what's your what's your point? Yeah, man. Because you guys are willing to pay $20, and then the witch will come and say that actually you're gonna die next week. Oh Shim. What now?

SPEAKER_06

I'm just gonna say that Americans have too much money to spend, man.

SPEAKER_05

Not even only Americans, UK people too are doing this. People and then I'm opening the comments on TikTok, and people are saying, send me the witch, send me the which, which witch did you use? Send me the witch. I'm like, are you guys okay? Are you guys okay? Oh my god, people are saying, oh, link it here, link it here, what's her name, what's her name? Is she good? What? Ultimately, like I just I just I need I just I need people to one be able to use their brains for themselves and stop being so willing to just jump on whatever you think is going to make your make it seem like whatever is happening next. And I I also do think that like a lot of this stems from a lot of people feeling like lost, yeah, and just wanting to know like how the future plays out and wanting to know that everything will be okay. That's why I said try Jesus.

SPEAKER_06

He's free, like he's cool. That is a good title. Try Jesus free. Oh my gosh, please.

SPEAKER_05

But also, the other thing that I was going to say on the people that are feeling that way is that this feeling is so normal. Like, even if you do try Jesus, that feeling of like, am I on the right path? Am I doing the right thing is constantly going to play your mind. It's just human life, it's it's hu it's the human experience. Um and you may never like there there will be times where you feel like you're not on the right path. But then five years from now, you can look back and be like, I was exactly where I was meant to be, doing exactly what I was meant to be doing. And I think that you need to follow your own instincts and follow your own intuition. And obviously, if you're a Christian, like allow God to lead you, but like asking for some principality somewhere that you don't know where, you don't know where where this witch is drawing their power from to then help you dictate like what you want to do with your life is terrifying. And like if you haven't thought about it in that way before, maybe hopefully this podcast will encourage you to look at it that way.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, please, that's scary. Hopefully, but you know, I feel like this thing is just a fad and it's gonna die and it's gonna go away soon. Like, where did the Etsy witches even come from? Like, what is this? Why are we why are people even so engaging in this?

SPEAKER_05

What's funny to me is that I'm sure half of these quote unquote Etsy witches are not even witches.

SPEAKER_06

Of course not.

SPEAKER_05

That's the reality. They're not even some of them are just people that are trying to make money. Of course, just just trying to be rich.

SPEAKER_06

Of course, you know, but you know, this thing has been going on for a while. That was my rant for the day. This thing has been going on for a time. Like it's like similarly with you know, tarot readers and all these like people that are telling. It's like, you know, they've just gone digital now, isn't it? They've just gone digital.

SPEAKER_05

That's the world we live in now.

SPEAKER_06

Everyone's gonna be online, isn't it? You know, sure, I'm online. Um I have we have like five minutes left, I think, right, of the episode. Two things. My two things.

SPEAKER_05

I wonder love's a thing. Particularly two things.

SPEAKER_06

First of all, I want to say a big I want to say a big F you to the Oh my I don't even want to say the name. The National Youth Service Corp of this blessed country. I think the the evil. That you have done is enough. And I want to say that you have wasted a lot of people's time and energy. You continue to waste a lot of people's time and energy. And you know, we spend a whole year to have achieved only God knows what. I do want to say a big thank you to all those who have helped me through my one year. I'm about to collect my certificates, God willing. If they don't extend me, but I am about to be done. I want to say thank you to all those who have helped me through, but I want to say a big F you to the institution, to the system that actually just needs to be abolished. Because I like what are we doing? Okay. What are we doing there?

SPEAKER_05

Um my God, it's actually it'll be it'll be a year next month now that you've been doing NYSC now.

SPEAKER_06

I'm about to finish. Exactly. By God's grace, I will get my certificates and I will come back and talk to you guys about my NYC experience.

SPEAKER_05

Um I think I think I really think that you should because I would love to hear because I've I've heard some like crazy NYSC experiences.

SPEAKER_06

What you say is you just need to wise up. Like you need to wise up. NYS NYSC does not tolerate you know, lax people who think that, you know, oh I'm just gonna no. You gotta open your eyes and shine your eyes. You need to be sharp, and that's what NYSC has taught me. Anyway, the second thing I was gonna say is um apparently everyone needs to be very careful of Glovo and Chow Deck because Why?

SPEAKER_04

What's happening there?

SPEAKER_06

And um, I mean, I heard this on the Loose Talk podcast, but I've also been hearing about this before. Apparently, people are making like fake restaurants on there, like they don't basically do enough verification. Um, and so before I was hearing that, people were saying before I heard it on the podcast, but people were saying that like all their um their fake restaurants are fake um restaurants on Globo. I didn't hear about child deck, and essentially you think you're ordering from I don't know, um, Ulala Cafe, but it's actually not Ulala Cafe. It's like some fraud that's pretending and like they would deliver your food to your door and everything, and you think you ordered from Ulala Cafe. Um but what they talked about on this show was like I think one tech outlet did like investigative journalism and like pretended to be a restaurant and like signed up for Glovo and Child Deck and like signed up and created their like website, sorry, the restaurant page, and we're selling food to people as a fake restaurant. So, all that to say is everyone needs to be very careful. If you're ordering at this faces, maybe you just need to get the direct number of the restaurants and just message them and get your food directly for them because it's really scary out there, and like you just don't know, right? How you meant to quality control and you just trust that these apps are doing their checks, but they're not. Um so yeah, that's a massive PSA for everyone, please. Like, please be careful, be so careful. Um, because you just don't know what you're eating and consuming. This is why you just need to just eat at home, then, or just go to the restaurant.

SPEAKER_05

Eat at home, honestly. I was actually talking about this yesterday, where I was just like, every time I enter Lagos, like, and I don't eat at home, my stomach. My stomach does it does not it does not. Don't you remember that time that I had to ask you to buy me oral rehydration soaps bad. I was down bad.

SPEAKER_04

Like I was down bad.

SPEAKER_06

Down bad.

SPEAKER_04

It was terrible. Yeah, definitely. Um it was it was really bad.

SPEAKER_06

Anyway, anyway, anyway. I think we have come towards the end of the POT.

SPEAKER_05

We have. I actually really love this podcast. I love this episode. I love this podcast. I mean, I love this podcast generally, but I really loved this episode. Um thank you guys for listening. Um let us know what you guys think about like let us know how um you guys are dealing with your relationship with your parents. And um, I actually feel like there's there's so much more that we can discuss on this as well. And like if there's other things that you want to hear, we can absolutely dissect it. But let us know um how you guys are dealing with it, what you guys are doing, if you guys are managing your relationships a lot better than we are. Um and um yeah, I can't remember anything else we discussed.

SPEAKER_06

So yeah, I honestly can't remember anything we discussed, but I can't remember But you know, let us know either way. Next week we will um because we wanted to touch on like what we've been listening to and enjoying lately. Maybe we do that like once a month. Yes. So we will bring that up next week um and talk talk a little bit about that. And I'll also remember to give you guys an update on my NYSC journey. Jarnae. And I cannot wait. Stay tuned for another episode of Oin O Last Rants, We know Last Corner. Yes, another rant coming.

SPEAKER_05

I really I really love um how we've called it O in all Last Corner. Um because even though the rant today wasn't really a rant, but next we're gonna have a serious rant for you guys.

SPEAKER_06

And she'd be um she'd be writing these rants down, guys.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, yeah. I showed her Irani one of the rants today, and she was actually just a bit perplexed as to how long it was. But like, yeah, I I I talk into my phone, so that's why. Um, anyway, thank you guys for working with us. We love you guys a lot, and um we will see you in episode eight.

SPEAKER_02

Goodbye, everyone.